General writing discussion.

AHR · 2011-07-20 11:26:12

Chagen: Copyright issues.

The_Edge · 2011-07-20 12:22:58

One of the greatest feelings I've felt as a writer is to see my creation come to life in the form of a videogame or a short film.

Counterclock · 2011-07-20 12:59:31

Videogame writer?

The_Edge · 2011-07-20 13:04:19

Otherwise known as a scenario writer, I think...

Chagen · 2011-07-20 13:22:08

Okay, so I want to write this story that starts out depressing at first, but gets more optimistic as time goes on.

The problem is, the beginning is filled with such Deus Angst Machina that it's ridiculous and quickly reaches Darkness Induced Audience Apathy levels.

How do those cynical works do it? How do they remain depressing and cynical yet not so much that it becomes absurd?

MadassAlex · 2011-07-20 13:32:05

Because they cast their own cynicism as a perspective rather than absolute truth.

Chagen · 2011-07-20 13:32:33

...Care to explain?

MadassAlex · 2011-07-20 13:34:34

Yes, but I'm on my iPhone right now. When I get to a PC, I'll elaborate.

┻━┻ ︵ヽ(`Д´）╯︵ ┻━┻ · 2011-07-20 13:36:46

Chagen: Copyright issues.

Is that supposed to be referring to his "why won't it be stolen if posted online" question?

Chagen · 2011-07-20 13:39:14

I thought publishers didn't take stuff that was on the internet because they were snobs and didn't think it was "real" writing.

MillerCross · 2011-07-20 13:43:29

Publishers don't give a crap about quality. What they care for is profit.

The word you're looking for is "Editor".

Anyway, the problem is more related to the fact that if it was published in the internet, then how the hell are you supposed to charge for it? And that, you know, text is the easiest thing to illegally download ever.

The_Edge · 2011-07-20 13:45:26

Webcomic are free online, but most of the long running ones have been published in collections now.

ClockworkUniverse · 2011-07-20 13:47:06

^And most of them have to include lots of print-only bonus content to get away with that.

The_Edge · 2011-07-20 13:49:11

Yeah, that's true. Plus for some there is a formatting issue that has to be solved one way or another.

Chagen · 2011-07-20 15:08:29

I'm thinking of having parts of my fic go into a chat-log like style--because the characters actually are in an IRC conversation. I wonder if this would look stupid. Homestuck did it and was pretty good.

The_Edge · 2011-07-20 15:09:40

Nah, it's not stupid. It looks kinda of cool sometimes, but don't over do it.

All Nines · 2011-07-20 15:47:38

^^ I did something like that in my VN, because the characters were discussing hang-out plans on Facebook, and I'll probably use it plenty in the future within that work. If it works within the plot and setting, and isn't thrown in just to look cool, there shouldn't be any room for complaint.

Chagen · 2011-07-20 15:51:12

The main character is a sort of a depressed down on his luck guy. He doesn't have a computer, so he uses library computers and chats with a person on there he's never seen in real life....but has become his only friend.

That's the reason its in the plot.

The_Edge · 2011-07-20 15:51:49

^Sounds good to me.

Katrika · 2011-07-20 16:46:59

Here's a poem that won me a writing scholarship:

Heavy eyelids and weary soul
Let your mind go, trace the story
Leap down into the rabbit hole
Dream a dream of strife and glory

Beneath the gray, fireflies dance
A muted vista, wind and shade
But do not stop at just a glace
At sights begging to be surveyed

A suble glow trapped in the trees
Reflects on rivers, dark and shy
A whispered voice, a constant breeze
A soft gray blanket blocks the sky

The pipeworks are the planet’s veins
The Slumb’ring One breathes at it’s heart
It’s always dim, but never rains
Like an unchanging work of art

A marble painted on a wall
No stars to light it’s cradled form
Just lightning bugs, so bright, so small
Always the calm, never the storm

Beneath the gray, fireflies dance
A muted vista, wind and shade
But do not stop at just a glace
At sights begging to be surveyed

You’ve seen that place within a dream
You’re up now, and you are awake
But close your eyes and hold the theme
And in your mind, a form will take

Here shadows have no hold or place
A pastel planet, light and rain
Where rainbows shine on ocean’s face
And through the storm weaves sweet refrains

Scattered islands cause waves to break
Upon their shores, all frosted white
Easy to forget what’s at stake
And lose yourself in seas of light

Danger is waiting in the deep
The one who lurks there’s hungry yet
So beware if you find his keep
Lest you get tangled in his net

Sit back and listen to the song
The raindrops carry as they fall
Then grab the clouds and play along
Unlock the truth, answer the call

Here shadows have no hold or place
A pastel planet, light and rain
Where rainbows shine on ocean’s face
And through the storm weaves sweet refrains

You’ve seen that place within a dream
You’re up now, and you are awake
But close your eyes and hold the theme
And in your mind, a form will take

A sleeping world, in winter lost
A smithy smothered in the snow
A land of frogs, a land of frost
A sky with soft fires aglow

Not choked out yet from snowflakes, cold
A tree peeks out, in frozen bloom
For here the spring still has a hold
Though soon the ice will form its tomb

The lake a mirror, cold and bright
Reflecting ribbons in the sky
Auroras blue and green, their light
Caught only in dim frozen eyes

Quenched far too soon, the divine flame
The forge , useless to The Lame One
And woe to those who take the blame
His rage is hotter then the sun

A sleeping world, in winter lost
A smithy smothered in the snow
A land of frogs, a land of frost
A sky with soft fires aglow

You’ve seen that place within a dream
You’re up now, and you are awake
But close your eyes and hold the theme
And in your mind, a form will take

See smoke and steel, smell singe and spark
Heat and clockwork spin hand in hand
A barren landscape, hot and stark
But in this bleakness, something grand

A tick tick tick, as if from clocks
The cogs grind for no cause, it seems
Steel towers mirror city blocks
But outlined with dull metal beams

And far below, the world enflamed
A boiling soup of molten gold
A wild sea, it won’t be tamed
But flow, triumphant, ever bold

And the Knight will set the fire
Of anger from a blacksmith god
So break the sword and draw his ire
Be the living lightning rod

See smoke and steel, smell singe and spark
Heat and clockwork spin hand in hand
A barren landscape, hot and stark
But in this bleakness, something grand

Alice woke and sat, confused
She rubbed the dreamdust from her face
And left her memories, bemused
To sit, and never once retrace

MadassAlex · 2011-07-21 00:24:24

I thoroughly enjoyed reading that.

Katrika · 2011-07-21 12:34:15

Then have some more of my poems!

Here's a sonnet I wrote I class once:

I got the news yesterday, and I froze
I did not say a word, nor did I cry
And at this time, the numbness only grows
Though I do not scream, or let loose a sigh.
I've gone past grief into another state
Where movement comes, though stiff and sapped of life
And thoughts still flow, untouched by love or hate
As cold as steel and sharper then a knife.
I do not care-not now, nor evermore-
That you were here, and left, not to return.
I merely grab the broom and sweep the floor
And turn my thoughts from ashes, or an urn.

I see your picture on the mantleplace
And feel a tear course hotly down my face.

And here's a more horror-oriented poem:

Listen now, a knock, a knock
Whoever could it be?
Reach the door, unlock, unlock
Then scream at what you see

“No!” you cry, “Not fair, not fair”
“You shouldn’t have got out!”
Smiling, they don’t care, don’t care
No matter how you shout

“Wait,” you plead, “Not me, not me”
“Go torment someone new!”
And they laugh with glee, with glee
That’s how they got to you!

“Help me, please, someone, someone!”
Screams echo through the house
They have had their fun, their fun
Like kittens with a mouse

Birdsong stops, she hums, she hums
Ignorant of the gore
And she hears the drum, the drum
Of knocking at her door

Vorpy · 2011-07-22 12:39:50

Thread is hard to find

I shall insertthetag GENERALWRITINGDISCUSSION and GENERALWRITINGTHREAD into it so I can find it later.

I have come across a Writer's Block problem with a point in my story.

One of my antagonists of the story is actually an half-angelic entity, and she was the one to go to to bring people who died horrible or unnatural deaths back to life, and heal the wounds and deformities of those unfortunate few. Later on in the story when she is subjected to the mind raping of another one of the first antagonist monsters, she goes into a giant fit of misanthropic anger when the 1st antagonist reveals to her all of the fucked up things that humans are capable of and all of the sins that her closest friends, the protagonists, have done in their past. Eventually she erupts into a rampage and begins to kill everyone in sight.

When she faces the protagonist team that aims to stop her, she would bring back to life the people closest to them and have them fight the group under her control, and force the group to kill their best friends, or give them sentience and murder them over and over again to punish them for the sins they did not tell her they commited.

As the story progresses to the end, however, and the protagonists dismember her wings and reduce all of the possible power she has to kill people, and take vengeance upon her for all of those people she killed and the other teammate protagonists that she killed herself, she begs for her life, proclaiming that if they let her live, she shall bring back to life everyone she has ever killed, and even use her power to control them to make sure that all of the wicked souls that still inhabit the earth are never to harm others ever again, so nobody else has to die an unfortunate death at the hands of a murderer ever again.

I currently can't think of any reasons for the protagonists to say no to this offer.

MillerCross · 2011-07-22 12:43:55

Depends on how do they come back.

At least, if it were me, I'd go with the approach of "Dead should stay dead" and "Bringing them back only causes problems down the road"

DonZabu · 2011-07-24 17:50:10

Anyone here who's played Morrowind wanna help me iron some concepts out?

delta534 · 2011-07-24 17:54:00

It's been a while but I can try.

DonZabu · 2011-07-24 18:03:23

Thank you.

These are the ideas I have for the main character and Caius Cosades. For the sake of a good plotline, I've made some slight alterations to the established canon, and filled in gaps where the original game left things vague, so bear with me.

Here's the character I imagine for the Nerevarine: his name is Vendal, and he grew up in the slums of the Imperial city, where the Dunmer don't have the same rights as the Imperials, and as such, developed a revolutionary disposition; he's talking all the time about the Dunmer rising up and overtaking the Imperial power structure. So when he's sent to Morrowind to work under Caius Cosades, he's indignant because he resents having to work for the government, and he sees Caius as representative of everything that's wrong with the Imperials. Likewise, Caius sees Vendal as an angry punk who doesn't know how things really are.

Over the course of the story, however, it becomes apparent that Vendal isn't the revolutionary badass he thinks he is; he talks a big game, but when he actually sees a Dunmer being beaten up and carried off to jail over something he clearly didn't do, Vendal does nothing but clam up even though he has every opportunity to stop it. Eventually, he learns what kind of sacrifice the whole thing really entails, and he learns how to be a true leader, in addition to shedding his preconceived notions about Imperials. What he doesn't realize is what's going on under the surface.

As it turns out, Vendal is being intentionally groomed by the Imperial government to act as Nerevarine to the people of Morrowind. It's an idea the Emperor and his council came up with; rally the people of Morrowind around one person so as to prevent civil unrest, and make it so that that one person is also loyal to the Empire and is willing to cowtow Morrowind's resources over to Imperial interests. So they started trawling the slum records and prison records until they found someone who suited the prophecy, and then they sent him (that is, Vendal) to Morrowind to train under one of their best agents, Caius.

Naturally, Caius thinks the idea is completely insane, but he complies out of a distorted sense of loyalty. Part of the reason Caius resents Vendal (besides thinking he's a punk) is that he hates having to put him through this, and as such, he wants to distance himself. But as they work together more and Vendal wisens up, Caius comes to respect him as a student, and on that basis, he tells Vendal the truth about what's going on and explains the whole scheme to him, considering Vendal more important than his loyalty to the Empire. And it's on that note that he leaves, going back to Cyrodiil to inform his superiors that the mission was a failure. Vendal is shocked by this revelation, but he decides to press onward, because he believes that Morrowind really does need someone to rally around, and even if he doesn't exactly believe that he's the Nerevarine, he's prepared to act as him if that's what it takes.

delta534 · 2011-07-24 18:12:55

So far so good.

DonZabu · 2011-07-24 18:26:06

So that's part one. Part two details his trekking across Morrowind uniting the Ashlander tribes and the Houses and all that. The only major difference is with Azura; the Moon-And-Star ring Vendal finds in the Cavern of the Incarnate acts as a direct conduit between Azura and himself, where he can communicate with the Daedric prince(ss?) and even enhance his magical abilities when he needs to win over the Telvanni councilors. But whenever he puts on the ring, there's a distinct mental and spiritual fatigue that sets in after he takes it off, so he resolves early on to only use it when his wits and combat ability aren't enough to win over the current situation.

So, too much of a Lord of the Rings ripoff there?

delta534 · 2011-07-24 19:20:29

Does the ring have any addiction like qualities.

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