›
If you have an email ending in @hotmail.com, @live.com or @outlook.com (or any other Microsoft-related domain), please consider changing it to another email provider; Microsoft decided to instantly block the server's IP, so emails can't be sent to these addresses.
If you use an @yahoo.com email or any related Yahoo services, they have blocked us also due to "user complaints"
-UE

General writing discussion.

24567…48

Comments

  • All NinesAll Nines
    edited 2012-08-20 12:52:44
    Has friends besides tanks now

    .

  • MalkavianMalkavian
    edited 2011-07-20 01:27:50
    MORONS! I'VE GOT MORONS ON MY PAYROLL!
    ^^^Elven sorceress, which the protagonist frees from the bondings of the Church.
  • MadassAlexMadassAlex
    One foot in front of the other, every day.
    Sorcery --> Witchcraft --> Cute Witch

    Or at least that's my line of thinking. I approve. 
  • ChagenChagen
    [tɕagɛn]
    "Elven"

    ME GUSTA.
  • MalkavianMalkavian
    MORONS! I'VE GOT MORONS ON MY PAYROLL!
    I suppose. Sorceress always translates as more chaotic in my mind. Wyldmagic and the like.
  • MillerCrossMillerCross
    You can change. You can.
    Can I have a sample of that, Malk?
  • ChagenChagen
    [tɕagɛn]
    I'd like one too. Though I can't critique it because I'm not good at that.
  • MalkavianMalkavian
    MORONS! I'VE GOT MORONS ON MY PAYROLL!
    When I get to a stopping point of some sort, sure. Critique is always welcome.

    Won't be for at least a week, though.... away from my computer and all that.
  • MillerCrossMillerCross
    You can change. You can.
    No worries. I can wait.
  • TheConductorTheConductor
    I'd like some critique, if no one is busy.
  • TheConductorTheConductor
    The Eldest of His Kin: Chapter I: The Angel and the Blacksmith

    I am unique. I am special. I am the first of my kind. I am Vorador. I was mortal once, but aren’t we all? Nearly half a millennia ago I lived in a great city named Avernus, at its very heart was a mighty cathedral and stretched high into the clouds, a mighty finger hoping to scratch the chins of our Gods. And within the city, amongst its putrid civilians, its dirty bakeries and its rotting libraries was my ever so humble forge.

    I was far from the greatest blacksmith in Nosgoth and that is why I was surprised when I received a customer who was not only to be my greatest, but my last. 

    It had been a dry, warm, Saturday morning, I had taken to polishing a set of armor outside, basking in the sweet rays of the sun. It was then that I saw an incredibly tall figure, wrapped tightly in a brown cloak. It stared intently at my shop.

    “Can I help you?” I grunted at him, and he seemed to consider this. 

    “Maybe.” He said, flatly. His voice was muffled and as he turned to me, I saw he had a scarf covering his face.

    “Is it not much too warm to be wearing such a thick garment?”  I asked, standing to meet the mysterious creature’s eyes. 

    “Perhaps.” He said simply and then his thoughts seemed to drift to a new subject. 

    “Then please, won’t you come inside?”  I beckoned.

    The forge was incredibly dark, it was cheap to build, and had no windows. The burning glow from the furnace was all the light I had needed. 

    I watched as the stranger removed his cloak and scarf. I recognized the creature instantly. His pale blue skin, three fingered hands, his fangs, his jet black hair, nails and feathery wings.

    “I am Janos Audron” said the vampire brandishing a curved sword “And I believe this is yours”.

    I took the sword from him and ran my fingers along the curves of the blade. It was indeed one of my creations; curvy blades were something of a specialty of mines. I told Janos as much as I welcomed him to take a seat by the forge.

    “But why have you returned it to me?” I asked him “The blade is nothing special, a shelf filler, nothing more”. 

    Janos held the sword in his hands, testing its weight and spinning it nonchalantly. “Simply put” explained the vampire “My brethren and I were impressed by this” he held the sword up and smiled “we want you to craft us a blade, a fierce blade. Worthy of our saviour”. 

    I was shocked by Janos’ proposal and I stuttered an acceptance. 

    “Excelent!” he cried, leaping from his chair and placing a hand on my shoulder. “I am sure you will produce a fine blade sir…” he looked at me sheepishly and added “I never did ask your name, you must think me frightfully rude”. 

    “Of course not.” I stammered as Janos pulled on his protective clothing “It is Vorador”, I added as the vampire turned back to me. 

    “Well then, Vorador. I shall return tomorrow afternoon with our plans for the blade”. 

    I could tell from the sudden rise in his cheeks that beneath his scarf, he was smiling. 

    “This is a most exciting prospect” he said as he left the forge and vanished into the crowd. I shut the door behind him as he left and considered for a moment that I had met a vampire. Vampires were a proud and noble race, the greatest beings in Nosgoth. They had gone by many names and were most commonly called the dark angels by members of the Avernus religion. At any rate, it was a great honour to be called to serve them. An honour that had fallen on me.

  • AHRAHR
    edited 2011-07-20 05:33:23
    Well, it's not bad.

    But you seem to use the same mechanical formulas over and over again. For the dialogue. I mean. 

    Also, for a first chapter, a bit too expositiony.

    ----

    Fucking writing how does it work? The hell if I know. All I know is I can't do it. I enjoy being a dick about it, and I complain when people are a dick about it to me, and that is also all I know.
  • The_EdgeThe_Edge
    Mr. The Edge goes to Washington
    I have been reading a lot this year. First five books of The Wheel of Time, Anasai Boys, Stranger in a Strange Land, Sword of Shannara. Not sure what I'm going to read next. I want to read Lovecraft and I have a first edition collection of Lovecraft that my wife great-grandfather had on his book shelves and I got it after he died. But, the book is too fragile for me to actually read. Going from Robert Jordan to Neil Gaiman was interesting. Jordan describes things in great detail which is why he wrote so many doorstoppers while Neil Gaiman is heavy on tone and atmosphere but barely describes anything.
  • NovaNova
    If you must eat a phoenix, boil it, do not roast it. This only encourages their mischievous habits.
    First five books of The Wheel of Time, Anasai Boys, Stranger in a Strange Land, Sword of Shannara.

    Try Brandon Sanderson's works.

    It will make the latest few books of The Wheel Of Time so much more awesome.
  • The_EdgeThe_Edge
    Mr. The Edge goes to Washington
    I shall! My mom-in-law should probably have some of Brandon Sanderson's books.
  • AHRAHR
    Could anyone read my first page (first post) here?


    I only don't post it directly here, because I don't know the rules for publishing, and I'm pretty sure I'm fucking up massively already, by posting it on tvt.
  • NovaNova
    If you must eat a phoenix, boil it, do not roast it. This only encourages their mischievous habits.
    Most people won't touch something that's been posted online.

    But you can easily just delete it once it's ready for publishing.
  • AHRAHR
    edited 2011-07-20 08:00:08
    Yeah, I know, but I've heard stuff about google, how they save archives, so they won't go away even after you delete them. X_x.
  • NovaNova
    If you must eat a phoenix, boil it, do not roast it. This only encourages their mischievous habits.
    Not really a concern.
  • ClockworkUniverseClockworkUniverse
    OOOooooOoOoOOoo, I'm a ghoOooOooOOOost!
    Traditional publishing has reached the point of paying less than competently-executed online publishing anyway, so you shouldn't worry about it.
  • ChagenChagen
    edited 2011-07-20 11:07:56
    [tɕagɛn]
    "Most people won't touch something that's been posted online."

    Why? Seems kinda elitist.

    "Traditional publishing has reached the point of paying less than competently-executed online publishing anyway, so you shouldn't worry about it."

    That worries me. I'd rather my books have a physical presence in the world, not just a digital one.
  • ClockworkUniverseClockworkUniverse
    OOOooooOoOoOOoo, I'm a ghoOooOooOOOost!
    Print-on-demand. Problem solved.
  • ChagenChagen
    [tɕagɛn]
    How many people would actually buy a physical copy, though? Most would probably go digital anyway.
  • ClockworkUniverseClockworkUniverse
    OOOooooOoOoOOoo, I'm a ghoOooOooOOOost!
    Indeed, but I think printed books will be available through print-on-demand long after the current publishing industry finishes the slow, painful death it's currently going through.
  • ChagenChagen
    [tɕagɛn]
    You know, the fact that physical media is dying is horribly depressing to me, but that's another show IJBM.
  • ClockworkUniverseClockworkUniverse
    OOOooooOoOoOOoo, I'm a ghoOooOooOOOost!
    Ah, but I don't think it is. I think print-on-demand is simply its future. So all that's really going to die off is the publishing industry that's been underpaying authors.
  • ChagenChagen
    [tɕagɛn]
    Who says they won't cut authors out of the deal? They've been doing it for years.
  • ClockworkUniverseClockworkUniverse
    OOOooooOoOoOOoo, I'm a ghoOooOooOOOost!
    Because under this model, the author would retain the rights to the work, and would oversee its publication personally. There isn't a middleman to cut the author out of the deal.
  • VorpyVorpy
    ☭Unstoppable Sex Goddess☭
    And that you won't ship out 100,000 books and only have 76,500 people buy them.
  • NovaNova
    If you must eat a phoenix, boil it, do not roast it. This only encourages their mischievous habits.
    Why? Seems kinda elitist.

    Because your work has been posted online?
Sign In or Register to comment.