IJBM - The Text Adventure (Now NSFW!)

Icalasari

>"Well, I can't make you as powerful as me, of course. Otherwise, go nuts"

IanExMachina

>Ask to clarify how powerful fluffy is.

Icalasari

>"I am a tier two deity, able to alter control abstract concepts and some laws of physics. My speciality is the classical element of fire"

>The mouse pokes out her head. "You're a fraud!"

>Yeah. Gone from ripping off arms to a bunny named Fluffy that is a god being chastised by a mouse. Whatever you had must have been GOOD stuff

IanExMachina

> Ask about the deity classification system.

Icalasari

>"There are four tiers. Tier four contains everything from demigods to mere single celled organisms. Tier three contains deities who represent some base concepts and nature based things - For example, life, death, water, fire, hope. Tier two also contains concepts but also laws of physics and more macro scale ideas. They tend to also be physical incarnations as opposed to merely controlling it. For example, Nature itself, Fire incarnate, Creation. Tier one contains Order and Chaos, which together control Reality. Lineage also can decide tiers. For example, my mother is Order. Crmirnauc - Matter and a tier two, has a daughter who represents Life"

IanExMachina

> Wish to be a class three deity, representing Hope.

Icalasari

>"There is already a hope deity, so I hope you don't mind sharing the spot with a butterfly-deer-mountain goat that is pastel colours". Before you can say anything, you are filled with a power. And possibly a hunger for aluminum cans

>One wish left

IanExMachina

>Ask about using new found powers.

OR

>Seek the answer within yourself about use of powers.

Icalasari

>You seem to have an innate knowledge about the powers. You can give people hope, or take it away. Your presence fills those around you with a peace, if you so demand it. You fill people with a heroic resolve and cause those with ill intentions to falter. You are also able to manipulate things other tier threes can, but not as effectively

Cue Bob coming in and making the third wish something like, "And add Sex to my designation"

IanExMachina

>Further probe self (hur hur) about manipulating other tier three stuff.

Icalasari

>You are able to do it, but it will annoy the other tier threes. Among the tier three stuff includes the ability to create new life, and take it away. General powers include teleportation, faster than light travel, being able to comprehend four dimensional space (and in fact teleportation involves going along this dimension of space), being able to think so fast that time may as well be stopped when you get lost in your thoughts, etc.

IanExMachina

> Give fluffy hope that the quest giver man will be nice.

Icalasari

>He laughs. "I just find him boring. You can stop trying to manipulate me. It tends not to work well on deities the same tier as you or higher"

IanExMachina

> Apologise and say 'Worth a shot'.

>Ask why the man wanted fluffy.

Icalasari

>Fluffy laughs. "It's perfectly fine. I'm one of the more relaxed deities, no need to apologize". You then ask the question. "Oh, I decided to hang out with him for a bit because he's old and senile. Turned out to be a mistake. Dear me is he ever insufferable! If he was a deity, he'd be the deity of 'slow death by boredom'!"

IanExMachina

> Say 'brb'.

>Go find the man.

>Give him hope to find a new friend, as that is the best gift of all!

>Ask for reward.

Icalasari

>The man thanks you profusely and gives you a rotting fish as a reward. "Cherish it, as I have!". He then walks off, skipping. The skipping ends up causing him to fall and shatter his hip. "What is this burning pain in my hip area?"

>...You know, you should have questioned his sanity when he told you that 'Fluffy' was a flaming rabbit without seeming at all worried about that sounding strange

IanExMachina

>Give the man hope that he'll be ok.

Icalasari

>He apparently already has that... or indigestion. You're still not quite sure of the fine details involving your powers

IanExMachina

>Make it so then wherever you walk you instil a vague sense of hope in people.

>Walk round town.

Icalasari

>People all over town were filled with hope as you walked past. Hope for a better future. Hope that they would get out of the slums. Hope that the police wouldn't come anytime soon and screw up the robbery. Hope that the raging house fire would go out before it consumed any more property. Hope that the wolves would leave a man alone and stop tearing him to shreds

IanExMachina

> Wonder if perhaps wishing to be in control of 'sense of purpose' or something may have been better.

Icalasari

>You wonder about that as a person falls off of a building and dies while hoping that he'd survive the fall

>The mouse pokes out her head. "FALSE! DEITY!"

IanExMachina

> Hope the mouse STFUs.

>Turn off hope field.

>Try bending the power of life to fix the jumper.

Icalasari

> Your hope is misplaced. She keeps calling you a fake and asking why you would betray the true gods like this and blah blah blah

>People start going back to normal as you fix the dead man. He is soon alive and healthy

>The mouse eventually runs out of wind

IanExMachina

> Look round town.

Icalasari

>You look around town. You see many different things. Humans, harpies, lizardmen, frogmen, anthropomophic mice, dragons, a few phoenixes, a crocodile that is also a tree...

>You also spot a few shops. Since you're a deity now, you can just poof yourself money to buy stuff. Or poof yourself the stuff but it's probably easier to make forged money than it is to make something made of multiple parts

Bob

Cue Bob coming in and making the third wish something like, "And add Sex to my designation"

Bullshit. Sex is boring, teasing is fun.

>Accidentally fill a doubtful soon-to-be super villain with enough hope needed to do something suitably heinous

Icalasari

>When you do so, your powers are sucked out and the villian becomes a god

Icalasari

>Reminder. 2 left after. Shut down. Blah. I'm a busy text rpg game. Chop chop