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Comments
I guess it goes to show that social graces can be valuable?
Interestingly, around half of women claim to have rape fantasies if the statistics are to be believed. Make of that what you will. Apparently they're ultimately about losing control: the man to his desire, the woman to her assaulter. Which I guess I can sort of understand on a subconscious level; the world can be overwhelming.
As for paedophilia, what makes it so dreadful is that children cannot give consent. This is very important to keep in mind, to say the least.
I'm really not sure what you're saying by this. Are you trying to contrast this with rape fetishism? Because, after all, rape necessarily also involves a lack of consent, so... I'm not sure if that's really much of a difference...
Any sane person can distinguish between reality and fantasy. both raep and paedo fetishes become holy fuck bad when the person cannot distinguish between fantasy and reality, let alone keep both separate.
I think that's oversimplifying things. I suspect (and have read) that a lot of rapists/child molesters/people-who-do-whatever-other-bad-thing can ordinarily pretty clearly distinguish fantasy and reality. It's just that when they're drunk or depressed or in any other mental state that impedes their ability to think clearly, they don't think about what they're doing and then end up doing something terrible. It doesn't mean they're insane though. Which I guess is worse, but the point is that saying that as long as someone is mentally stable they aren't going to commit any sort of sexual assault because of a fetish they have seems a bit too much like just trying to make simple clear-cut divisions of groups of people where they don't really exist.
"It's just that when they're drunk or depressed or in any other mental state that impedes their ability to think clearly, they don't think about what they're doing and then end up doing something terrible. It doesn't mean they're insane though."
Which is still potentially a problem then. It's not like being drunk or depressed is uncommon, and you cannot control the latter.
"Which I guess is worse"
Indeed.
^^ But, actually, the fact that it is worse means it's even more important to not fall into the trap of thinking "mental stability = not dangerous." That seems to be a pretty commonly expressed idea, and the repetition of it, I think, actually has a negative effect on people who might have a greater predisposition to committing some kind of sexual assault (either due to having a certain fetish or for whatever other reason). It makes people think that, since they know when they're sober and not overly stressed and otherwise level-headed that rape is bad, that there's no chance that they could potentially be harmful to someone else. I don't think that rape fetishism implies being a rapist or anything like that, of course (since, y'know, I've already said I don't), but it is probably true that someone who has a fetish for something like that might be more inclined to do things like that in extreme situations. And so, they should at least be aware of that, and... er... I kind of lost my train of thought... >.>
The point is though that if you say that certain fetishes are okay if you're sane, bad otherwise, then you're possibly promoting a harmful way of thinking.
^ That is true too, and actually I suppose the vast majority of people who do rape people while drunk don't have rape fantasies. Still, it's something worth thinking about?
In that case, it certainly deserves to be at least looked into. Also, it's odd that you focus on the dominating perspective, since the submissive perspective is a significant portion of rape fantasies as well.
My view is that most people who have some kind of rape fetish are highly unlikely to become rapists, so to that extent it isn't harmful. I wouldn't ban it (and how could you do that anyway?) but I think it's best kept private and off forums like this, simply because most people don't want to hear about it. I would apply the same rule to practically all sex, at least in too much detail. I mean, you should be entitled to say "I'm gay!" but not "I'm gay and you'll never guess what I did last night..."
Like every other fetish, the biggest problem is that if that's the only means of sexual satisfaction for you and it's a big part of your life, there is a risk that you end up an obsessive and isolated from anyone who isn't a fetishist. However, that probably reflects deeper problems in forming relationships.
^This last part. I think most of the people identifying as x fetishist are confuzzling it with a kink.
Now, from a sociobiological standpoint(which is only pseudoscientific evopsych masking under another name), kinks are a good thing since as they haven't evolved away, so they must be an asset. I'll leave you to figure out for yourselves what that asset might be in the game of natural selection.
From an armchair-psychological standpoint, this sort of thing can have as many explanations as there are people with said kink: misogynists having revenge fantasies, insecure virgins relishing the idea of giving up control to someone who will do everything to them and take away any responsibility and power on their part, depressed people using it to confirm their self-hate and inferiority complexes, etc., etc. Especially given the broader definition of what constitutes rape, bodice rippers, BDSM, femme fatales and love charms would also fall into said category of power fantasies.
From an academic perspective, I think we should get some statistics up in this bitch stat, because there's bound to be some actual research on it. Plus then the ones who wait behind the wall can have their obligatory chants of apologism.
From a personal perspective, someone with a rape kink would be curiosity at best and someone to make fun at worst. If someone actually admits that sort of shit in meatspace, they're bound to be so socially clueless it's hilarious.
evopsych masking under another name), kinks are a good thing since as
they haven't evolved away, so they must be an asset. I'll leave you to
figure out for yourselves what that asset might be in the game of
natural selection.
Incorrect. Evolution is not that efficient. A trait surviving through the evolutionary process only indicates that it is not sufficiently harmful to the carrier's odds of passing on their genes.
Thus, appendixes, and the survival of malign genetic traits such as poor eyesight.
^ I think this ties in with the point I made earlier - one of the problems of this is that it can take over your life if you aren't careful, although that's probably true of any kind of sexual activity. Also, unusual and disapproved-of fetishes can be isolating. It must be tempting to just sit in your hugbox with your supportive fellow-fetishists.
^^^^^Meknows. Had a guest lecture/performance that pointed out the ridiculousness of the premise by taking every fetish imaginable and given faux-scientific explanations of how these would be beneficial in evolution. Although the presenter was an insane bio-artist so he put graphic images on each accompanying slide. Suffice to say I'll never look the same at an elephant's trunk again.