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Post internet comments that made you facepalm here.

edited 2011-11-28 19:51:56 in General
No quotes from TVTropes or this forum, please. And no attributing the quotes.
«1345

Comments

  • "Because YouTube is really where I do politics."
  • Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human
    There are too many.  Do a Youtube search for "Barack Obama", "Ron Paul", "Rick Perry, "Michelle Bachmann", and other notable political figures, and you have a goldmine of stupid comments sitting before you.
  • You can change. You can.
     Do a Youtube search

    This is where you should have put a period and hit "post comment"
  • edited 2011-11-28 20:30:54
    Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human
    No, see, many of the comments to YouTube Poop videos are surprisingly hilarious.  Especially the upvoted ones.

    You see:

    * videos with nonsense -> great comments
    * videos with meaningful content -> shitty comments
  • You can change. You can.
    uh, well, i have a hateboner for youtube poop, so
  • "* videos with nonsense -> great comments

    * videos with meaningful content -> shitty comments"

    Pure confirmation bias. Unless you think reposting stuff heard in the video is the epitome of wit.

  • Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human
    Okay, fine.

    On YTP videos:
    * most comments are inane repetitions of lines from the video.  These comments are short, non-argumentative, and noncontroversial.  I am indifferent toward these comments.
    * some comments are witty comments about the video.  These usually get thumbs-upped.  They are also rather amusing or satisfying.

    On political videos:
    * most comments are either (or sometimes both)
    ** argumentative diatribes attacking the politician or political position or political ideology that the commenter opposes, frequently using logical fallacies, neglecting real-world implementation problems, and at best arguing ineptly and at worst evidence that humanity despite all cultural developments is still a miserable little pile of secrets
    ** nearly substanceless dissing of the political figures or ideology featured in the video, usually with name-calling, purposeful insulting misspellings (e.g. "lieberal" or "cuntservative"), and/or expletives
    * a few comments are comments telling people to shut up and stop arguing.

    Which one's worse?
  • edited 2011-11-28 21:43:14

    "political videos"

    "meaningful content"

    Well, I guess that depends on the video. Though still, "meaningful content" is a pretty broad term.

  • edited 2011-11-28 21:42:46
    Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human
    ...fine.



    Obama: "Stop...stop the political circus."
    Congress: ":("
  • Facebook politics war: "because i am representative of the intelelctual elite"
  • Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human
    "because i am representative of the intelolctual elite"

    fixed
  • "because lol"

    fixeder
  • I am Dr. Ned who is totally not Dr. Zed in disguise.
    People 4rm home stop spreading rumour abt me iam not pregnate n for ur information iwont get pregnet until ifinis my law degree
  • No rainbow star
    ^ That's far from the worst problem in that comment
  • ^^ When she finally finises her law degree and is pregnate, will she have joined the intelolctual elite?
  • edited 2011-11-29 13:24:00
    But you never had any to begin with.
    Nonono, she'll be pregnet when she ifinises her law degree. Not pregnate.
  • edited 2011-11-29 14:31:24

    "Ayn Rand was a cult leader and charlatan, not a serious thinker. Anything she said, Friedrich Nietzsche, Max Stirner, and Ernst Junger said it better."

    A response:

    "agree with ____, ____ has no formal background on objectivism and is trying to connect it to altruistic idealists."

  • edited 2011-11-29 16:33:57
    Loser
    glennmagusharvey,

    From what I have seen, what you said about YTPs occasionally having pretty interesting comments is true, especially when the one who made the video asks for names for it through the comments (as Combuskenisawesome has done from time to time).

    On the subject at hand, while I unfortunately did not save it at the time, I did once see a comment on a martial arts video that pretty much said something to the effect of "you are doing it all wrong, I could beat you, your master, and your master's master" and other tough guy stuff like that. I guess that made me chuckle more than facepalm though so maybe it does not count.
  • edited 2011-11-30 14:03:37
    I am Dr. Ned who is totally not Dr. Zed in disguise.
    Three things dt i luk at wn a guy is hitin on me. . 1.eyes-i got a thng 4sxy eyez 2.hands-man u goin to use thoz handz 2touch me i want em soft n getle n oh neat! 3.m0st important.Lipz tjo hona ledi lipz tse tshosang kantle kam0na."
  • Every time someone says "the dislike bar is as long as Justin Beiber's penis." I'm not a Justin Beiber fan, but this comment isn't funny.
  • But you never had any to begin with.
    But penis jokes are the peak of comedy, didn't you know?!
  • Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human
    Maybe the peak that's located at the crotch of the mountain range.
  • Silence is golden.
    . (Jag was actually good. The 32-bit software had a lot of stuff added
    that somehow boosted it to 64. The process was so complicated that few
    games could use its full potential.) But no 3DO?! FUUUUU- Since 3DO
    would obviously be #1...I'll exclude it. 

    10.

    Nintendo
    64DD. Released in 1999, this thing was DOOMED. Added on like a Siamese
    twin to the N64, Nintendo expected bad sales due to it having took TWO
    YEARS to make. ONLY NINE games were released, and they were all
    Japan-only. Just 10,000 of these trash bags were even sold! But it's low
    because Nintendo at least acknowledged it and got themselves out of the
    crapper before they reached their Game Over.

    9.

    Sega CD.
    The Sega CD uses processing. But the day and age was too young for it.
    That's why most of their games are LITERALLY MOVIES! Jeez, if I wanted a
    visual novel, I'd bust out my laptop and play some Umineko.
    So...badly...PIXELATED! But it at least DOES have the best Sonic game
    ever, Sonic CD.

    8.

    Virtual Boy. I can't say anymore. I need to rest my eyes.

    7.

    Sega 32X. SELF-EXPLANATORY.

    6.

    Atari 7800. Honestly Atari. Do you think those one-button games WOULD EVEN COME CLOSE to the games expected in the 8-bit era!?

    5.

    Wonder Wizard.

    Kid in '73: HOLY SH*T A HOME PONG CONSOLE! IWANTITIWANTITIWANTITIWANTIT AND I WANT IT RIGHT NOW!

    Later...

    Same Kid: THIS THING DOESN'T WORK! &@$!&@?#+>?~£•)&(<\|¥>^}=*+%{,[.]-!

    ...Kid, whaddaya expect? The body is made fully from a Magmavox...speaking of...

    4. (I'm tired, okay?)

    Magnavox
    Odyssey. I can't really say much due to the limited info. You have
    SHEETS for detail. All it is is a blue screen with a dot...but it was
    '72, so it's kinda to be expected. So it's a bit low.

    3.

    CD-I. Also self-explanatory.

    2.

    Atari
    5200. The games were a bit more complicated than 2600. But THE
    CONTROLLERS BREAK SO EASILY...HOLY SHEESH. And they're worse than the
    Intellevision, I gotta say.

    1.

    I couldn't help it. 3DO.
    SEVEN HUNDRED BUCKS FOR A SH*TTY THIRD PARTY SYSTEM THAT DOES ABSOLUTELY
    NOTHING BECAUSE ALL THE GAMES SUCK AND THE CONTROLLER IS A DEMENTED
    RIPOFF OF THE SNES ONE, WHICH THEY ALREADY MOCKED IN THE COMMERCIAL!? ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? Seriously. RLY!?


    favorite part is when he says the Sega CD "uses processing".
  • edited 2011-11-30 20:49:45
    No rainbow star
    i think naked blacks are invisible at night

    I'm not even sure what to make of that...

    EDIT: Whoops, even after stripping a ton of formatting I forgot to remove the name
  • To be fair, it's sort of something that came up every once in a while in war literature.  Not necessarily naked of course, but I remember reading in a few different places that the WWI Germans got pretty annoyed at having to deal with black soldiers at night, for example (I wish I could remember where).  It's mentioned briefly in All Quiet on the Western Front too.
  • ^ For what it's worth I remember having a school visit from a guy who was in the Territorial Army (the British Army's militia of "weekend soldiers") and he said black soldiers still had to wear the black face-paint stuff that soldiers use, because their naked skin would reflect light shone on it; it wasn't matt-black.


    On-topic, anything from any of those "life sucks, why do we bother?" blogs that Myrmidon does threads on sometimes will make you facepalm until your skull collapses.


     

  • No rainbow star
    ^^ What I find really bizarre is that it was one of the better comments on the video

    Dear lord the racism...
  • edited 2011-12-04 10:18:12
    But you never had any to begin with.
    "I know this is going to be brought up, but Tiananmen incident is hardly
    the perfectly example of peaceful protests, no, the movement was
    subversive in nature and secretly backed by western powers, with the
    explicit goal to incite violence as evident by the fact that most
    leaders of that protest are now living in the comfort of political
    asylum abroad, and the fact that many protestors were armed with knifes,
    metal pipes, molotov cocktails and a variety of other improvised
    weapons, many of which were used in the killings of over two dozen
    policemen and soldiers."

    ...White-knighting the Tiananmen Square Incident? Yeesh...
  • Let me guess: is this about Occupy Wall Street?
  • But you never had any to begin with.
    Nah. It was about a 2 year old in China getting hit by a van, and 17 people ignoring her. Someone brought up Tiananmen, and it snowballed.
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