Images you know you'll never use. (Now NSFW)

glennmagusharvey

glennmagusharvey

This is among the stranger shitposts-that-might-not-be shitposts that I've seen.



Also I'm amused that that rubbed-out username isn't actually rubbed out completely and can be guessed to some extent.

Stormtroper

NSF maybe?

glennmagusharvey

https://twitter.com/abc/status/1422247763421667330

glennmagusharvey

https://i.imgur.com/dx57swE.mp4

glennmagusharvey

Stormtroper

lrdgck

glennmagusharvey

glennmagusharvey

glennmagusharvey

There's a duplicated image in the previous post but it's funnier if you are trying to figure out whether there's a special meaning behind it.

Stormtroper

glennmagusharvey

Oh right, Contraptions are now a thing in MtG.

What does crank mean?

glennmagusharvey

Stormtroper

I forgot, it's one of those joke set things, I think it involved some alternate deck or something.
*checks* not quite:

To crank a Contraption means to trigger the triggered ability they have.

They did Steamflogger Boss dirty that the contraption thing ended up not being part of the "real" game.
Also, the auth-center one should be Nin, the Pain Artist, or maybe Fevered Visions, or if we go strictly by card names then The Royal Scions too. Edit: It doesn't help that Brutal Expulsion is colorless.

glennmagusharvey

Steamflogger Boss was in the Future Sight set, I remember.

Seems like they've only been part of Unstable, meaning that they're still only a joke set thing?

Stormtroper

Correct. Though keep in mind that Steamflogger Boss is still legal elsewhere (even the Unstable version is black-bordered), even if its Contraption ability can't do anything.

glennmagusharvey

Oh it's the border color that is used to determine legality?

I thought it was just the set.

Stormtroper

No, you were correct, it's the set*, it's just that Steamflogger Boss is (AFAIK) unique among the cards of the un-sets (besides the basic lands) in that it's black-bordered, as a reminder that it's a reprint from a normal set and is thus legal wherever that set is legal.
* Exception: gold-bordered cards aren't legal anywhere even though they're all reprints from legal sets (they're basically proxies).

lrdgck

glennmagusharvey

https://twitter.com/JoelMacManus/status/1424582421740089346

lrdgck

6% of Americans confident they could beat up a grizzly in hand-to-hand combat:



Hey @glennmagusharvey, where would you personally draw the line?

glennmagusharvey

Hahahaha this

I've seen it before, and I think something that complicates this measure is what's defined as "winning" or "losing". I think frequently "winning" is defined as subduing or even outright killing the other animal, whereas "losing" is defined as simply getting injured and/or running away.

The goose entry, for example, shows this really clearly. Geese are large and imposing and able to bruise and cut by biting and wing-slapping, but otherwise pose little threat. If you're willing to let the adrenaline flow through you to ignore minor injuries in order to overpower a goose, you could do that quite easily, by my estimations. (Note: I have not actually fought a goose before, so this is based on what I understand about geese.) You'd basically just need to grab the goose's neck, and while you might get scuffled, it's basically all over after that point as far as who's controlling whom.

Anyhow, as for the rest of this I'd say it depends on (1) how much I really want to beat up the animal, despite possible injury to myself, and (2) to what extent the animal is already aggressive toward me or alternatively to what extent I would be able to sneak up on the animal.

If you would put me into a steel cage with an angry whatever, and I weren't already mad at them, I'd do that for the rat and the goose. The rest are too annoying. If I *were* mad at them and wanted to beat them up, I'd take on the cat as well, and maybe the eagle (depending on the height of the cage) and the dogs. Possibly the chimpanzee but their behavior is harder to predict, and possibly the cobra just because it's slower, if I'm really daring.

On the other hand, if you're asking me to beat up a docile animal that I had no beef with, I just wouldn't bother. On the other hand, if I do have beef, and thus reason to capture/maim/kill the animal, I'd see how easy it would be to sneak up on them and/or lure them even with just hand gestures.

In an optimal scenario, the only things I wouldn't be confident of my ability to take down bare-handed would be a grizzly bear, an elephant, a lion, gorilla, kangaroo, and maybe eagle. The crocodile and cobra are slower (well, unless the croc is in water in which case I would just nope out of the match unless I can get it on land), and while the "bare-handed" stipulation means I can't use tools, I can still use cover, and also choose shoes that have quieter soles. The wolf and dogs can be reasoned with if I wanted to deceive it, and so can the chimp. (The gorilla too, but if things go wrong I can't overpower it as easily.)

glennmagusharvey

lrdgck

They asked for "sundae" and got "soon die". An honest mistake.

Also, I appreciate how much thought you put into the assessment of your combat ability vs. various animals. No, really. Though at the same time, this sentence is so metal:

In an optimal scenario, the only things I wouldn't be confident of my ability to take down bare-handed would be a grizzly bear, an elephant, a lion, gorilla, kangaroo, and maybe eagle.

----

Stormtroper

lrdgck

I had a few pairs of shoes that had these sorts of similar-but-not-quite-the-same logos.

glennmagusharvey

lrdgck

glennmagusharvey

https://imgur.com/3zvQXMT

I'm rather curious how they got this mechanism to work.