Today, I saw the most beautiful girl I had ever seen

Hatter

Silly Khwarizmi, foxes don't eat grapes.

Sammy

"I hate having to be on a schedule and I would just abhor the idea if
having to plan time to be with her and I'm horribly antisocial anyway. I
hate having to be at a specified place and and time. I also usually
hate having to take time out of my day to be with people, because I'll
have to actually respect their wishes, while if I was alone, I can do
whatever I want."

Do you plan to work at some point in your life?

"And I have such strict standards that pretty much no girl is ever going to be fit for me."

Such as?

JG_Punk

^ Being "pretty" and finding his anti-social behavior acceptable.

TL;DR: Wanting to date him.

Chagen

No.

They would be:

Is an avid anime/manga fan.

Is athletic and likes to be active.

Is an avid hardcore gamer.

Is very nerdy/a bookworm

Is heavily boisterous and energetic.

Possesses same kinks that I do or is very open-minded and willing to try them.

Is very independent (may be slightly submissive, but is also very strong mentally).

Is good at some kind of art like singing or artistry.

Is very quirky like me--has the same crazy ideas and odd worldview as me.

Optionally Japanese American, but could be European.

These are rather strict...

InsanityAddict

So someone who basically has all your hobbies, but also the energy and fortitude to compensate for your antisociality and insecurity?

Ergo, you hope a relationship will fix some flaws you perceive in yourself. It won't. In order to snag up such a dudette, you need to work on yourself, and not geek out over her having the same interests, since she has probably already had a lot of mouth-breathers who went after her for that exact reason.

DarkDecapodian

'James Blunt's music/not worth the trouble/twee pop-folk doesn't/warrant permastubble/Burma Shave'

Totally not referencing things I just came across while wikiwalking...

TheConductor

You know, Chagen, you really shouldn't be so fussy if you ever want to get laid...

Hatter

> Optionally Japanese American, but could be European.

HAHA OH WOW.

Chagen

What are you saying? Are you implying that I'm a Neo-Nazi?

TheConductor

^ Are you a troll? No one said anything even remotely close to saying you're a Nazi. Of any sort.

Vorpy

Chagen is a troll, seriously. How could he have gone this long without knowing how to properly convey his thoughts or knowingly do things that piss people off, while contradicting himself a hundred times over? He's doing most of this shit on purpose.

Myrmidon

A lot of people have this thing called a personality, which changes over time as a result of experience while retaining some consistent features. You should try it, Vorpy.

Vorpy

That coming from somebody with no personality...it's quite funny.

glennmagusharvey

I once tried to imagine what my ideal girlfriend would be like.

I then noticed that a lot of the girls I found attractive in real life deviated greatly from that ideal.

Then I stopped trying.

Chagen

Conductor: He was laughing at my statement of preference for Europeans and Japanese people. Who just so happen to be considered Aryans by Nazism (Hitler made the Japanese "honorary Aryans" for joining him in WWII). Why else would he laugh so much?

nohaynicklibre

Hatter

Wow, Chagen, that's kind of a stretch.

I was laughing at how you intentionally limit your attraction to women to fit some nebulous, exotic ideal based on your anime cartoons. It reminded me quite a bit of Chris-chan and that fat kid on Craigslist who demanded a "nihonese" girl to be his girlfriend.

Considering how quickly you thought I was talking about Axis countries, though, you might have some other issues.

IanExMachina

Longfellow

Hatter, to be honest, I couldn't tell what you were laughing at either.

Nyktos

But that's another story. The conundrum of the shy girl with the broadsword.

Hey, I remember that!

Chagen

Hatter, I always assume the worst, even when it wouldn't make any sense. It's just part of my personality. Not to mention that sites like Stormfront have broken my perception of humanity so much that I tend to be very paranoid/pessimistic about things said on the internet.

Stormtroper

It's just part of my personality.

Well, change that.

RedEyedAbyss

"No.

They would be:

Is an avid anime/manga fan.

Is athletic and likes to be active.

Is an avid hardcore gamer.

Is very nerdy/a bookworm

Is heavily boisterous and energetic.

Possesses same kinks that I do or is very open-minded and willing to try them.

Is very independent (may be slightly submissive, but is also very strong mentally).

Is good at some kind of art like singing or artistry.

Is very quirky like me--has the same crazy ideas and odd worldview as me.

Optionally Japanese American, but could be European.

These are rather strict..."

If you want everything, you'll end up with nothing.

┻━┻ ︵ ヽ(`Д´）╯︵ ┻━┻

"nihonese"

AHAHAHAHAHSHSHHAHHSWHEWBEBJHEQH*(@43y6ygasdhjj

OH WOW

glennmagusharvey

I think the correct term would be "nipponese" anyway.

Chagen

Or possibly "Cipangese".

┻━┻ ︵ ヽ(`Д´）╯︵ ┻━┻

"Cipangese"

I hope you're being sarcastic.

Chagen

"Cipangu" is/was the Spanish name for Japan. It's were the word "Japan" comes from.

"Cipangu"--->"Japan"

Vorpy

I remember that thread too.

Nyktos

@Chagen: And Spanish got it from Portuguese, which got it from Malay, which got it from Chinese. What does Spanish have to do with anything anyway?