'The craving for a baby that drives women to the ultimate deception.' ('Sperm Stealing')

IanExMachina

"I called his bluff and told him there was no way I would want a baby with him, given he didn’t earn any money. Yet the truth was, I had hatched a plan that many will doubtless find shocking.

Because he wouldn’t give me what I wanted, I decided to steal it from him. I resolved to steal his sperm from him in the middle of the night. I thought it was my right, given that he was living with me and I had bought him many, many M&S ready meals.

The ‘theft’ itself was alarmingly easy to carry out. One night, after sex, I took the used condom and, in the privacy of the bathroom, I did what I had to do. Bingo. 

I don’t understand why more men aren’t wise to this risk — maybe sex addles their brain. So let me offer a warning to men wishing to avoid any chance of unwanted fatherhood: if a woman disappears to the loo immediately after sex, I suggest you find out exactly what she is up to. 

As it turned out, my attempts to get pregnant by Trevor failed, and shortly afterwards he and I split up.

But my dreams of motherhood persisted, and I resorted to similarly secretive methods to conceive in my next relationship. And given that I was in my early 40s by then, this was an even more urgent situation."

Daily Mail columnist Liz Jones.

I think such behaviour is low.

RedEyedAbyss

"Daily Mail"

Aren't they supposed to be raising alarmist scares about people who do this kind of thing?

IanExMachina

^

No she's a white UK citizen who isn't a Muslim.

AHR

I don’t understand why more men aren’t wise to this risk — maybe sex addles their brain. So let me offer a warning to men wishing to avoid any chance of unwanted fatherhood: if a woman disappears to the loo immediately after sex, I suggest you find out exactly what she is up to. 

Actually, going to the bathroom is common after sex, since the penis tends to hit the ares that  are near the organs produce urine.

MadassAlex

In Melbourne, there's this tabloid called mX. I read it sometimes when I'm on the train, because it's freely provided at stations. Every day, there's an opinion column by one of the contributors, and it's invariably the most obnoxious block of text in the whole paper, and that's saying quite a bit. First step: don't let 20-somethings in a quarter-life crises write shit about their uneventful lives. One day, on contributor wrote about how their "friend" was "executed" in front of a "crowd". The "twist" was that their usual train had been cancelled. Absolutely fucking disgusting.

^ Likewise, most guys feel like peeing after a climax so as to clear the channel, so to speak.

IanExMachina

^^

Clearly just a myth propagated by women so they are able to steal sperm easier.

/dailymaillogic

^

>One day, on contributor wrote about how their "friend" was "executed" in front of a "crowd". The "twist" was that their usual train had been cancelled. Absolutely fucking disgusting.

....what?

AHR

Oh, and once sperm is exposed to air, isn't it pretty much dead?

Or was I misinformed?

TheConductor

Nah, that shit can survive for up to six hours.

AHR

Ah. Okey. Cool.

IanExMachina

^^^

Few hours maybe, depends on the environment.

Ninja'd

MadassAlex

...what?

---

Twenty-something tabloid journalists thinking they're clever.

AHR

I DON'T GET IT.

RedEyedAbyss

Yes, this is one joke that desperately demands to be explained.

MadassAlex

There's no joke. The column was a whole page down, one-third width across, explaining about how devastated the onlookers were. And then it turns out it was a train cancellation, which is not only incredibly predictable, but a filthy tactic for calling attention to the flaws of the transport system.

AHR

...OH I GET IT NOW. 

...

What.

Vivi

....I DON'T get it. >:<

MadassAlex

In Melbourne, the public transport system is a common topic. It's generally quite good, but has some failings.

mX is an immature tabloid run by self-important twenty-somethings.

One of them compared the inconvenience of a train being canceled to public execution via metaphor.

I find this horribly trivialising and offensive.

RedEyedAbyss

Twenty-somethings, you say. In other words, people either still in post-secondary or just graduated and in both cases, they think that means they know everything?

MadassAlex

It's more to do with the kind of twenty-somethings that somehow, haven't hit the real world yet, and it seems common with journalists in that age group.

IanExMachina

I can see why you find it offensive.

Tabloids are pretty generally shitty really.

MadassAlex

This goes above and beyond. Just a few years ago there were a few execution videos circling the internet from warzones, and I believe one or two might've entered public consciousness. I know the conflict in the Middle East is winding down from a Western perspective, but that's no excuse to draw such a comparison. Those executions were filmed so as to be directed towards the West, and they ended up with heavily public audiences. To compare something as petty as a canceled train to fairly recent examples of wartime brutality is going much too far, especially in the name of some asshole journalist's sense of smugness.

AnneBeeche

Oh Daily Mail.

-_-;;

Gelzo

I guess sperm-stealing is sort of analogous to rape?

MadassAlex

I guess in one sense?

Gelzo

Sorry, I'm not sure where I was going with that.

MadassAlex

No, I get it. Stealing a man's sperm is certainly a violation, even if it's less severe than the violence of rape.

AnneBeeche

It should probably be noted that there are men that steal procreation (feels like a weird way to word it), too, though it isn't them the ones who are pregnant.

Gelzo

Well, when it happens to the man, he can't make the decision to abort.

So. Are there any laws against doing this? Seems like it could be hard to prove, but it seems wrong if the father is still held financially responsible.

AnneBeeche

he can't make the decision to abort.

Because it's not like abortion is a heavy decision and a big thing to go through and everything.

Abortion is not as simple as popping a pill, guys. (Unless you count the morning-after pill which stops the blastula from being able to implant so that it is simply passed out of the body, but I don't.)

Gelzo

I never said that, but there's a difference between having an option and not having an option.

AnneBeeche

That is true.