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American Chinese restruants
They are ubiquitous in the States, almost as much as McDonald's.
Every single one of them is identical, as if they're all by one company trying to avoid franchising laws or there's a Brill's Bible of "Chinese" restruants being passed around. They look as stereotypically Chinese as possible - red and gold, dragons and bonsai trees everywhere, giving the restruant this Fu Manchu look that's out of date and a bit offensive. The food consists of dishes taken from random east Asia countries Americanized to hell and back. Everything is fried, slathered in fat and cooked with very Western ingredients like tomatoes, broccoli and dairy products, and mediocre versions of purely American foods like chips/fries and pizza are often served alongside. It's served lukewarm and underseasoned, and despite the blandness it's extremely high in sodium. At the end of your meal, you're given a "fortune cookie", a hollow shell that tastes like sweetened styrofoam with a faux-Confucious saying typed on a piece of paper inside it.
So why do I keep coming back to these places?
Comments
And my Chinese uncle actually makes some bangin' Chinese food.
Then again, my parents can read Chinese and they know what to order. Stuff like:
* Singapore-style stir-fried rice noodles (delicious curry-flavored pan-fried noodles dish, typically comes with shrimp, scrambled eggs, and a few other ingredients)
* "dry fry" beef noodles (wide rice-noodles stir-fried with beef and typically pieces of scallions and these bean sprouts that I don't know the name of)
* scallion pancakes (not really "pancakes" but just flat dough that incorporates pieces of scallions, pan-fried)
* a stir-fried noodle dish with pork, specifically one that, when done properly, ends up with a special kind of noodle part crispy and part juicily moistened with a topping of pork cooked with various vegetables
I go to Chinese restaurants all the time. Yes, the cheesy ones, with the cooks and waiters howling in Mandarin in the kitchen while they cook up a sweet, salty, spicy dish of fried chicken and broccoli. When I'm in a hurry, I go to the chain restaurants and get takeout from Mexicans who look as Asian as I do.
And do you know why?
Because it's tasty and nourishing.
Food is supposed to be tasty and nourishing.
Americanized chains like PF Chang's?
Standard delivery chinkslop joints?
One-off sit-down restaurants, usually with a buffet?
Chinatown shop with ducks strung up in the windows?
Or what? All of the above?
@Hatter: I agree wholeheartedly. And while it's not technically Chinese, Mongolian Barbecue is the greatest food ever.
But seriously, this stuff is pretty much one of my biggest guilty food pleasures. I know it's unhealthy, I know it makes a mockery of all Asian cuisine BUT DAMMIT GIVE ME THOSE DUMPLINGS ARGHGBLARGARBLE!
Also, in actual Chinatowns some restaurants have a hidden menu that the locals eat from. That's where the real Chinese food is.
Real Chinese and American Chinese certainly are different, but that doesn't actually mean one is better than the other. Think of it like Mexican and Tex-Mex.
Sesame chicken is the heart and soul of all chinkslop. That, orange chicken, sweetnsour chicken, and beef/pork fried rice.
I had sesame chicken for lunch today.
It was tasty.
> Americanized chains like PF Chang's?
I actually don't like these as much. They're basically U.S.-American takes on Chinese dishes, with annoying results.
Yes, I dislike P.F. Chiang's. I don't care how fancy their frontal sculptures are.
> Standard delivery chinkslop joints?
If by this you mean those half-crappy-looking fast food joints, I usually patronize these only if they have reasonable prices (by reasonable I mean $5 or less for a lunch entree), and I like them because the food is half decent. It might be overflavored and oversalted, but at least I know I'm getting decent amounts of starch, fiber, and protein in my diet--the same cannot be said of stereotypical U.S. cuisine like burgers.
(Also, watch ya language.)
> One-off sit-down restaurants, usually with a buffet?
These are generally nice, but depend on the chef. You're likely to get menus with actual Chinese here--along with chefs who actually know how to cook real Chinese food to a good standard of quality.
> Chinatown shop with ducks strung up in the windows?
These tend to have roughly the same quality as the third or second category, depending on the shop. That said, if you do get whatever's strung up in the windows (generally one or more of the following: roast duck, roast pork, barbecue pork, and various styles of chicken), it's almost guaranteed to be awesome. Assuming you know how to separate meat from bones, of course.
doesn't actually mean one is better than the other. Think of it like
Mexican and Tex-Mex.
Taste wise, yes I can agree. And I can understand why the Americanized stuff is so popular, many traditional Chinese dishes just do not mix with the Western palette. However, real Chinese food has actual heritage behind it, rather than the pretense of one.
Mind you, this is coming from someone who has watched way too much No Reservations.