Dreaming about fictional characters

Bob

It makes me feel... dirty. As if I'm no better than those pathetic bastards that jizz their pants over Kasumi and Lara Croft and whoever else. It's less jarring in that I know their not real and I really don't want to fuck them, but it's still weird.

Fuck you, Netherrealm studios.

Myrmidon

Give in to the PSL Bob. Admit that you want to fuck Bowser.

Crimson

At least your not writing terrible fanfics about them.

Bob

...Since when is Bowser a Mortal Kombat character?

Well, given Kratos and Superman could be considered to be a part of the MKverse...

But srsly, fuck you, I ain't no furry.

Myrmidon

Okay, admit that you want to fuck Voldo.

Bob

Eww, no. That's gross, Myr!

You know I don't fuck Italians!

Counterclock

Well, you have PSL for something, so I don't think you have room to talk

Myrmidon

Mario and Luigi told me differently, Bob.

Bob

I'm pretty sure you're mistaking me for Vorpy, d00d.

Counterclock

It's not that hard of a mistake to make, really.

Myrmidon

The difference is that Vorpy lies a lot and Bob tells us she's a troll a lot. 

Bob

When have I ever said that I was a troll, silly?

Myrmidon

Every five seconds.

Counterclock

Not that much of a difference then, when you think about it.

Bob

^^Exactly. You have no proof. Therefore, I have never said that I was a troll.

Counterclock

So, out of curiosity, what character was it then?

Myrmidon

I'm guessing she had a dream threesome with Jade and Baraka.

Counterclock

Based on any reasoning or?

Bob

It was... [Mileena]

Basically, the entire dream was [us having hot lesbian sex] while [running around and playing pranks on people and vandalizing random shit, also we set a convenience store on fire], then [there was this weird, Thelma and Louise seen in the middle of it], and [Sheeva] was there two, but she [didn't participate in aforementioned hot lesbian sex], so her presence isn't really worth mentioning, and then we (as in, me and [Mileena]) [killed a few of the other Mortal Kombat characters for the hell of it], then [I told her how pretty she is and that her teeth don't put me off at all, she started crying tears of joy and we got married].

Surprisingly enough, Jade was involved. [We fought her and Kitana, convinced them to fuck us, then left].

vacasama

At least be glad you can't jizz in your pants because of your gender.

You know of Mortal Kombat?  Weren't you in kindergarden when the first MK came out?

Bob

Of course I know about MK, silly. Granted, I was introduced to it via MK2 instead of the original MK, but still.

vacasama

Ah okay.  I think that's first time I've seen a woman have fetish filled dreams about MK.

Bob

Well, it wasn't really a fetish drea-

>Tarkatan teeth

>Murder

>Lesbian four-way

>Four-armed amazonian Shokan third wheel

>Vandalism

>Arson

...Nevermind.

Forzare

I had a dream that I was the Heavy from TF2 once.

vacasama

Do other games give you these kind of dreams?

Bob

Only Ninja Gaiden (and by extension, DOA) and the Mass Effect series.

vacasama

Those have hot women too?  Yes, I already know DOA hot women too.

Bob

I hate the DOA women. My only PSL target in DOA is Ryu Hayabusa.

As far as Mass Effect, Tali, Samara and, since seeing the pics for ME3, Ashley.

vacasama

Is it because the DOA women lack a personality?

Bob

That's putting it generously. It's because the DOA women are nothing more than the same pairs of boobs, only attached to slightly different bodies with slightly different faces in different clothing. They're like mannequins, only with bigger, bouncier boobs.