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Let's Suffer Through: Before Watchmen
So, DC's ill advised prequel to Alan Moore's master piece is starting soon, and I'm going to be reading it in the store and talking about each issue here.
The series doesn't actually start till next month, I just wanted to "call it" as it were. See you soon folks!
Comments
I thought comic book stores got mad if you read without buying.
Why not just get them online? Probably be easier and it'd be less awkward methinks.
hey
hey
hey guys
let's all read before watchmen online together and comment throughout our collective despair
They've actually gotten some pretty good writers to do these, I hear.
While the actual idea may be pretty ill-advised, we might actually get something decent out of these books. I'm not holding my breath, though.
To be honest, from that checklist, almost absolutely nothing calls my attention except maybe Cooke, which I've heard wonderful things about. I don't have much of an opinion on Wein (he created Swamp Thing and Wolverine, but Moore and Byrne were the ones who turned those characters into the icons they are today, in my opinion)
My issue is with both Azzarello and JMS who both suck at writing superheroes. Azzarello, specially, as he's tackling both Rorsharch and the Comedian. Seeing as his past work is all about pseudo-gritty badasses like Phillip Graves and such, I can't help but fear that the nuance that made Watchmen a clever work about how vigilante justice doesn't always turn out as relatively nice as Batman is turned into unironic glorification of both Rorsharch and the Comedian's actions.
Zen: Yes but I used to work there and I am on close speaking terms with everyone there, they wont mind me.
Malk: But Malk! That is illegal and I would never, ever do that (No siree, I would never check We-Comical, rs.4chan and filespart for comics I don't buy want to read, that'd be terrible)! Besides, by reading it in the store I can at least get some opinions and funny quotes from them. I might download them later to illustrate the blog.
Juan: Hit the nail on the head there, especially with Roscharch, they will (inevitably) portray him as being really cool and stuff, despite that being the exact opposite of the point of the character!
Wait, what? When was this announced? Holy fuck.
...
Please, please, please don't suck.
...
Yeah, alright, it's gonna suck.
It's too bad I have no goddamn clue where they sell comic books in my neck of bumfucksnowheresville.
I suppose I'll need a job then.
...
Stupid economy. ~shakes fist~
I for one am dissapointed there is no mini for the space squid. Seriously though, you know what would be awesome? A Tales of the Black Freighter mini. No relating to the plot or setting or anything. Just pulpy horror stories with pirates and modern art.
...i think i want an squid prequel anymore. the stories of a world conqueror breeded in a jar! how did he see the world beforehand! did he bath before destroying NYC? did NYC reek forever of squidness? those are some legitimately interesting questions.
I'd love some genuine pirate comics, but my desire for those are completely separate from my appreciation for Watchmen.
Just a heads up: I'll be starting this off tomorrow with Minutemen #1.
AND THUS! IT BEGINS!
Before Watchmen: Minutemen #1
Minutemen #1 has two covers, and I am assuming that both of them are by Darwyn Cooke as their is no credits page (So I guess he did everything for this series...or at least this issue). I don't really like the first cover, it's just a picture of Niteowl at some kind of parade, it has a nice kind of sepia tone to it which I think fits the Silver Age kind of setting.
The second cover is, in my opinion, much better. It features the entire team, standing together and it is all very nice and dynamic. Cooke is very good at silently showcasing characters, we can tell at a glance what all these characters are like. Some are jovial, some are jittery, some enjoy the glitz and glamour of crime fighting. All-in-all it is a very nice cover, and waaaay better than the other one.
One of the things I am going to do with this blog is not shoot down each series just because of what it is. I want to go into each one with a positive mindset, looking at what is good and what is bad with each issue, judging it by its own merits rather than by its legacy.
So we open with the original Nite Owl, Hollis Mason, writing the last few pages of his book; Under The Hood. A tell all book about his life as a superhero. He also has some kind of trophy shaped like himself, and a dog. He's then called up by some guy called Larry (who I don't think was in the original series) who isn't happy with Mason's book and asks him to meet him for breakfast in the morning.
Mason then looks at a photo of the Minutemen together (The same one we see in the original Watchmen) and we cut back to 1939. We're shown a little scene of Hooded Justice being so awesome he causes a guy to piss himself. Then we cut to Sally Jupiter, the original Silk Spectre. We're shown that she wasn't so much a crime fighter as she was an actress, who along with her manager Larry (I face palmed when I realised that Larry from earlier was meant to be Sally's husband from the original) staged crimes to make money.
Then we see Nite Owl, who was using his position as police officer to track down criminals, we see a pretty cool scene where he chases a fleeing vehicle and fights the guys inside. Next up; Eddie Blake, The Comedian, who was just as much of a dick as a kid as he was when grew up. He basically smashes up a bar while beating up criminals and then instantly turns against the bar's owner. Next up is Bryon Lewis; Mothman, a filthy rich crime fighter who developed a glider suit. Apparently he was shit scared of it and it led him to being addicted to alcohol and pain killers...I am hoping not at he same time!
We're not shown much of Dollar Bill, just a little scene of him defending a bank which is then revealed to be a film reel. We're shown a bit more of Ursula Zandt, the Silhouette and woman who escaped Nazi Germany and is described as the one who was trying to make the most genuine difference in the world. Rather doing it for money, glory or thrills. Mason also admits that he was in love with her, anyway she chases some dick heads and saves a little boy from them.
Finally we are shown Captain Metropolis, (Nelson Gardner0 an ex-marine lieutenant who, along with Larry, came up with the idea of gathering the various masked mystery men.
Over all, this wasn't a bad comic y'know? It was well written, fun to read and the stylish artwork really fit the setting. The only problem I had with it was it didn't seem to have the stark realism that made original so popular.
(For anyone wondering: I am going to look at the Black Corsair back ups, but not until the series is finished)
My issue with the Minutemen issue is that Cooke is a damn good writer/artist, but what he does doesn't fit the world described Alan Moore in Watchmen. It works sweetly in stuff like New Frontier which is all about nostalgia and good ol' times, but it really doesn't fit that Watchmen, which is about how nostalgia's bad for you.
Before Watchmen: Silk Spectre #1
This comic has four covers; the first is a collage made of a large image of the Silk Spectre, with various characters from the story cascading in the large "S" on her costume. It's really nice and has a kind of, 60s pin-up feel to it.
The second one, for lack of a better word, is really groovy. It has Silk Spectre dancing in front of a barrage of psychedelic colours. The third one is shit. It's just Silk Spectre up against a wall. Moving on. The last one is my favourite; it is the same as the first but in black and white (except for Silk Spectres lips, hair, eyes and earrings that are really brightly coloured) it's really cool, kind of thing you'd want blown up and hung on your wall.
We open up to young (probably no older than ten) Laurie smashing a snow globe and giving us a bit of narration on how parents have to lie to their children to keep them safe. Sally comes into the living room sweeps up the broken snow globe. They then have a bit of a cry since Sally's ex-husband (he's also referred to as Laurie's dad but she denies it so...) has been the house (probably fucking Sally) and has now left.
We then cut to 1966 and a teenage Laurie doing pole vaults. After a very successful jump, she starts talking to a guy named Gregg who wants to meet her after school. She says she can't and then her cougar of a mum picks her up and suggests that she go in her place. Obviously she was joking. I hope.
Later that night, we cut to Laurie trying on her costume, it's rather revealing and we can tell she dislikes it because the first chance she gets she puts a housecoat on to cover it. She goes to the living room to watch TV when she's attacked by a burglar...who she then pummels the shit out of. I turns out the burglar was just Sally and this was another training routine. Laurie loses her temper and tells her mum that she's tired of having every aspect of her life controlled by her mother.
Sally phones up Hollis Mason to ask for advice. We don't see Hollis' side of the conversation, but he basically calms her down. Sally goes to Laurie's room to check on her, only to find that she's gone! She of course went back to the school to meet Gregg, who offers her a cigarette (CAUSE HE'S A BAD INFLUENCE YOU SEE). It turns out the two of them have a lot in common as Gregg's dad is constantly pushing him to be the best he can be and is forcing him to sign up with the Marines like he did. He gets beer on his shirt and has to take it off and it turns out he is covered in bruises from boxing with his dad, he then kisses a bruise on Laurie's shoulder.
We then jump to a cafe that Gregg frequents where a total bitch called Betsy starts tormenting Laurie about her mother's sordid past. There's an amazing little joke where she says she can't see the family resemblance between Sally and Laurie, then flicks some cream in her face and says "now I see it". So Laurie knocks her the fuck out and runs back home.
She tells her drunk and crying mother that she hates her and then packs her bags and runs away. Gregg then shows up and confesses his love for her and the two decide to run away together. The two then get picked up by a couple of hippies, closing the issue.
This issue was...fine. Everything about it was, average which is still better than what I was expecting of it.