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5 Uncomfortable Truths About Liberals

edited 2012-03-27 14:45:50 in Wonderful posts
I clench my fists and yell "anime" towards an uncaring, absent God, and swear solemnly to press my thumbs into Chocolate America's eyeballs until he is blinded, to directly emasculate sporting figures, to beat the shit out of tumblr users with baseball bats, and to quietly appreciate what Waylon Smithers being gay means to me.

http://townhall.com/columnists/johnhawkins/2012/03/27/5_uncomfortable_truths_about_liberals/page/full/


1). Most liberals are hateful people.


2). Liberals do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group.


3). Most liberals are less moral than other people.


4). Most liberals don't care if the policies they advocate work or not.


5). Most liberals are extremely intolerant.


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Comments

  • Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human

    I have no idea what the expanding pharaoh cat image means.


    That said...


    1). Most liberals are hateful people.


    2). Liberals do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group.


    3). Most liberals are less moral than other people.


    4). Most liberals don't care if the policies they advocate work or not.


    5). Most liberals are extremely intolerant.


    Let's try a small change, shall we.


    1). Most conservatives are hateful people.


    2). Conservatives do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group.


    3). Most conservatives are less moral than other people.


    4). Most conservatives don't care if the policies they advocate work or not.


    5). Most conservatives are extremely intolerant.


    Holy shit, this seems to be just as full of shit.

  • edited 2012-03-27 14:57:02

    "2). Liberals do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group."


    After "Your economy get very weak. Ours get very good. We take your jobs",  it takes quite a bit of audacity or wilful blindness to say that.


    ^Ooh! Ooh! Do socialists! 

  • a little muffled

    Eh, #4 is arguably largely true, though no moreso for one side of the political spectrum than the other.

  • I clench my fists and yell "anime" towards an uncaring, absent God, and swear solemnly to press my thumbs into Chocolate America's eyeballs until he is blinded, to directly emasculate sporting figures, to beat the shit out of tumblr users with baseball bats, and to quietly appreciate what Waylon Smithers being gay means to me.

    I have no idea what the expanding pharaoh cat image means.


    Ironicat. It's an ironic cat.

  • Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human

    1). Most socialists are hateful people.


    2). Socialists do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group.


    3). Most socialists are less moral than other people.


    4). Most socialists don't care if the policies they advocate work or not.


    5). Most socialists are extremely intolerant.


    Sounds pretty full of shit, too.  But let me do one better:


    1). Most bronies are hateful people.


    2). Bronies do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group.


    3). Most bronies are less moral than other people.


    4). Most bronies don't care if the policies they advocate work or not.


    5). Most bronies are extremely intolerant.


    Totally rad!  I see no change in its effectiveness!  Who's up next?

  • We Played Some Open Chords and Rejoiced, For the Earth Had Circled the Sun Yet Another Year

    >Open article 


    >First section is complaining about Al Sharpton and the New Black Panther Party


    nooooooooooooooooooooooope

  • edited 2012-03-27 15:59:23
    OOOooooOoOoOOoo, I'm a ghoOooOooOOOost!

    Hm. Tried doing it with "people," but it didn't work thanks to 3. Here's one:



    1). Most gamers are hateful people.


    2). Gamers do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group.


    3). Most gamers are less moral than other people.


    4). Most gamers don't care if the policies they advocate work or not.


    5). Most gamers are extremely intolerant.



    And now I just have to wait for Fox News to come along and cite me.

  • edited 2012-03-27 16:03:44
    Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human

    1). Most anime fans are hateful people.


    2). Anime fans do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group.


    3). Most anime fans are less moral than other people.


    4). Most anime fans don't care if the policies they advocate work or not.


    5). Most anime fans are extremely intolerant.


    C'mon fundies!  Cite me!  That not enough?  Call now, and I'll throw in a second set of Uncomfortable Truths, absolutely free!


    1). Most D&D players are hateful people.


    2). D&D players do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group.


    3). Most D&D players are less moral than other people.


    4). Most D&D players don't care if the policies they advocate work or not.


    5). Most D&D players are extremely intolerant.

  • Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human

    Hey guys!  I figured out how to be an anti-American commie pinko in five easy steps!  Just watch me:


    1). Most capitalists are hateful people.


    2). Capitalists do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group.


    3). Most capitalists are less moral than other people.


    4). Most capitalists don't care if the policies they advocate work or not.


    5). Most capitalists are extremely intolerant.

  • OOOooooOoOoOOoo, I'm a ghoOooOooOOOost!

    But on the other hand:



    1). Most anti-American commie pinkos are hateful people.


    2). Anti-American commie pinkos do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group.


    3). Most anti-American commie pinkos are less moral than other people.


    4). Most anti-American commie pinkos don't care if the policies they advocate work or not.


    5). Most anti-American commie pinkos are extremely intolerant.


  • edited 2012-03-27 16:45:06
    HEIL MEEEEE

    1). Most Jews are hateful people.


    2). Jews do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group.


    3). Most Jews are less moral than other people.


    4). Most Jews don't care if the policies they advocate work or not.


    5). Most Jews are extremely intolerant.



    holy shit it actually works

  • No rainbow star
    ^ Been a while since I've seen THAT sock puppet
  • Confound those Dover Boys! They drive me to drink!

    Propaganda?


    I'LL MAD-LIB IT!  NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW!


    1). Most Dover Boys are hateful people.


    2). The Dover Boys do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group.


    3). Most Dover Boys are less moral than other people.


    4). Most Dover Boys don't care if the policies they advocate work or not.


    5). Most Dover Boys are extremely intolerant.

  • Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human

    So I actually went and read the source article for these statements, and--HOLY CRAP.


    1). Most people who overuse bold text are hateful people.


    2). People who overuse bold text do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group.


    3). Most people who overuse bold text are less moral than other people.


    4). Most people who overuse bold text don't care if the policies they advocate work or not.


    5). Most people who overuse bold text are extremely intolerant.

  • I clench my fists and yell "anime" towards an uncaring, absent God, and swear solemnly to press my thumbs into Chocolate America's eyeballs until he is blinded, to directly emasculate sporting figures, to beat the shit out of tumblr users with baseball bats, and to quietly appreciate what Waylon Smithers being gay means to me.

    1 and 5 are basically the same thing. But you are right, Townhall, liberals are intolerant. They're intolerant and hateful towards your right to freedom of speech and freedom of religion.

  • Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human

    ^ wait what

  • if u do convins fashist akwaint hiz faec w pavment neway jus 2 b sur

    :allears:

  • edited 2012-03-27 17:24:43

    Oh great, a shitty fad has been spawned. It was funny for the first bit, then it started getting ridiculous.


  •  1). Most Dunmer are hateful people.


    2). Dunmer do more to encourage race-based hatred than any other group.


    3). Most Dunmer are less moral than other people.


    4). Most Dunmer don't care if the policies they advocate work or not.


    5). Most Dunmer are extremely intolerant.



    Nice.

  • if u do convins fashist akwaint hiz faec w pavment neway jus 2 b sur

    Don't be too hard on them, they've gone through tough shit and are the Jews of Tamriel, after all.

  • I clench my fists and yell "anime" towards an uncaring, absent God, and swear solemnly to press my thumbs into Chocolate America's eyeballs until he is blinded, to directly emasculate sporting figures, to beat the shit out of tumblr users with baseball bats, and to quietly appreciate what Waylon Smithers being gay means to me.

    I think that you good people here may have had some reason to believe that the above statement was not entirely sincere and may, in fact, have been sarcastic. 

  • Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human

    Poe, please stop your revolving door from turning for a moment.

  • I clench my fists and yell "anime" towards an uncaring, absent God, and swear solemnly to press my thumbs into Chocolate America's eyeballs until he is blinded, to directly emasculate sporting figures, to beat the shit out of tumblr users with baseball bats, and to quietly appreciate what Waylon Smithers being gay means to me.

    I probably could've ended that with "Freedom to use your speech to scream slurs at minorities and freedom to use your religion to shame teenagers into committing suicide."

  • edited 2012-03-27 19:08:43
    if u do convins fashist akwaint hiz faec w pavment neway jus 2 b sur

    That's the flip side of freedoms - some will undeniably end up abusing them. Even when they end up being regulated to prevent such abuses, the regulations often end up being abused themselves. Turn it either way and you're fucked. It's depressing.

  • Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human

    I see freedom of speech as including the freedom to, through misguided speech, mark oneself as a doofus to one's peers.

  • I clench my fists and yell "anime" towards an uncaring, absent God, and swear solemnly to press my thumbs into Chocolate America's eyeballs until he is blinded, to directly emasculate sporting figures, to beat the shit out of tumblr users with baseball bats, and to quietly appreciate what Waylon Smithers being gay means to me.

    Freedom to bully gay teenagers into committing suicide. Freedom to publicly shame women who have been raped. Freedom to plead for the murder of black people and gay people. 

  • Has friends besides tanks now
    Siding with CountryPumpkin; verbal abuse isn't as easy to dismiss as "whatevs, the guy's an idiot".
  • Give us fire! Give us ruin! Give us our glory!

    That's the flip side of freedoms - some will undeniably end up abusing them. Even when they end up being regulated to prevent such abuses, the regulation often end up being abused themselves.


    This. Total freedom of speech leads to cases like ^^that, while regulated speech leads to dissent being silenced. Like a lot of things, it's not a black and white issue.

  • I hate how narcissistic free speech arguments often are.

  • Give us fire! Give us ruin! Give us our glory!

    ^I don't follow.

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