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(Nate's grandfather, about his father's fraud charges) All he had to do was put on a suit, sit behind a desk and not get arrested.
(Serena, to Blair, after a pregnancy scare) I'm so happy! I'd have had no idea what to wear to a paternity hearing.
(Nellie Yuki) All I want is to be alone and to never listen to Flo-Rida ever again.
(Serena, about a boy she's seeing) The lifeguard's got a Camaro. And not in an ironic 'I've got a Camaro' way...
(Blair, to Serena, about their respective images) I'm sick of looking like Darth Vader next to Sunshine Barbie.
(Serena, to Eric, about their mother Lily's third husband, who was a Qatari oil baron) I know I enjoyed our brief conversion to Islam.
(Blair, to Serena) He's hot and you actually like him!... how often do you find that in the same guy.
(????) We have to do something that is not illegal.
(Lily, about party food) Nobody is comforted by a tuna tower.
(Serena, to Blair) We don't want your obit to say you died in Brooklyn.