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How my dad views homosexuality and bisexuality

IcalasariIcalasari
edited 2011-10-03 00:18:50 in General
No rainbow star
I remember that years ago I was freaking out over possibly being bi (Conservative family + Catholic school = Yeah...). When I told my parents my worries, my dad pretty much said that unless I'm thinking constantly about how to ask a guy out, then I'm not bisexual/gay That STILL bugs me. So dicks on the mind isn't gay as long as I don't think about dating a guy (he pretty much said thinking about penises while having sex on the mind is normal and straight)? >.>
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Comments

  • BobBob
    edited 2011-10-03 00:22:16
    By that logic, most people would be asexual.

    ...Well, most people who aren't awkward teenagers, at least.

    Still, that's weird. Also, is it odd that I saw who made this thread and I still somehow thought it was someone else?
  • ForzareForzare
    Till shade is gone, till water is gone, into the Shadow with teeth bared, screaming defiance with the last breath, to spit in Sightblinder’s eye on the last Day.
    No.  Or at least, I did too.  >.>

    On topic: Yeah, that's annoying, but at least he isn't calling you hellspawn or some-such.
  • SchitzoSchitzo
    They're somethin' else.
    I think I know who.

    In any case, I don't know that feel, but I did go through catholcism and saw firsthand what effect it had on gay students, so yeah. Feel better, bro.
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    No rainbow star
    ^^ He pretty much thinks that he set me straight, so he doesn't know I'm bi. So I have no idea if he'd call me hellspawn or not
  • BobBob
    ...Set you straight? So, he knew, but he thinks you're straight now?
  • ForzareForzare
    Till shade is gone, till water is gone, into the Shadow with teeth bared, screaming defiance with the last breath, to spit in Sightblinder’s eye on the last Day.
    ^^ Ah.  That could be problematic.
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    No rainbow star
    ^^ Yeah, pretty much

    ...Sort of awkward when he calls people who piss him off gay or homo
  • BobBob
    Wow. Well. Huh.

    ...Awkwaaaaaard...
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    No rainbow star
    Yeah. At least I have a girlfriend so that doesn't cause any issues right now

    ...If I ever break up with her though and get a boyfriend, then I will not look forward to the explaining to my dad part
  • BobBob
    How did he act when he knew you were bi?
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    No rainbow star
    ^ He didn't believe it at all. He wasn't angry or anything. Just skeptical as if I was being an idiot
  • BobBob
    edited 2011-10-03 00:43:44
    Huh. Maybe that'll work in your favour and he'll think it's just a phase, long enough for you to get married to a handsome French man named Philippe and run away with him to the Philippines where you to can make sweet homosexual love and adopt three adorable children and eventually grow old and die together, with him going first and you writing a novel in his memory that at first gets only modest success before becoming immensely popular after your death, rendering your children rich, allowing one of them, her curiosity getting the better of her, to seek out her biological parents back in the Philippines before seeing a hallucination of you in a lake, assuring her that you and Philippe loved her as their own child, convincing her to leave well enough alone and live the rest of her days in secure happiness, knowing that she was truly loved.
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    No rainbow star
    ^ You put quite a bit of thought into that o.o
  • BobBob
    edited 2011-10-03 00:46:36
    Yep! Of course, it's just idle speculation and totally not the product of having psychic vision or an idea for a book / movie I have based on a psychic vision or anything, that would be ridiculous.

    By the way, he does NOT like doggy style. Just thought you should know.
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    No rainbow star
    ^ If what you predicted comes to pass...

    ...Then what are next weeks Lotto 649 numbers?
  • BobBob
    Pffft, that's an easy one. The next weeks Lotto 649 numbers ar
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    No rainbow star
    ^ :< You tempted C Jack, didn't you?
  • BobBob
    Hello, Icalasari. We Regret To Inform You That We Have Taken Your Friend, "Bob", Into Custody For Reasons We Cannot Yet Reveal To The Public. We Apologize For This Inconvenience.

    -The CIA
  • BobBob
    ...Hey Ica. About those Lotto numbers...

    Yeah, I, er, I can't... I just can't.

    -gets into the fetal position, starts crying-
  • korohoro147korohoro147
    :O
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    No rainbow star
    Show me on this doll where they touched you, Bob
  • BobBob
    edited 2011-10-03 01:02:42
    -points to the head-

    There! They touched me there! It was terrible! I kept crying and begging them to stop, but they wouldn't listen! THEY WOULDN'T LISTEN! TT_TT
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    No rainbow star
    There there Bob. You're safe now. We'll put these bad men away so they can never hurt you again

    Do you want a cookie?
  • BobBob
    -hears the word "cookie", is reminded of the government sanctioned mind-rape, freaks out and starts crying-
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    No rainbow star
    What kind of cruel fiend makes an innocent girl scared of COOKIES!?
  • BobBob
    -tries to talk in between sobs-

    Torture... Horrible... Slab of wood... Warm milk... Chocolate chip...

    -collapses on the floor, continues crying-
  • korohoro147korohoro147
    ~comforts bob~
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    No rainbow star
    ^^ ...Santa was involved?
  • BobBob
    OH GOD THE GIFT WRAPPING! TT_TT

    -runs off, crying-
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    No rainbow star
    Well, I'm about to end his ho ho hos
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