Bob

Mr_Ant · 2011-08-20 03:42:08

A.K.A. Midnight Velvet A.K.A. MV A.K.A. Doctor_E A.K.A. DubGee A.K.A. annoying shitfaced bitch. I honestly, honestly don't see how she hasn't been banned yet. She's a passive-aggressive, self-absorbed condescending tool, and I hope she chocked on her father's semen while deepthroating him for five bucks. I hate this bitch I hate this bitch I motherfucking hate this motherfucking BIIIIIIIITCH. >:[

Central Avenue · 2011-08-20 03:42:37

It doesn't count if you have to make it yourself, Mr. Sockpuppant.

Bob · 2011-08-20 03:45:31

Oh my god, your first thread! How cute. I'm so proud of you! ^_^

Just two nitpicks, sweety. One, I'm not passive-aggressive, I'm aggressive-aggressive. Two, I don't have a brother.

It's alright thought, they're pretty common mistakes. :P

Mr_Ant · 2011-08-20 03:48:36

If you were as smart as you act like you are, you would that "aggressive-aggressive" isn't even a real thing. Besides, I'm pretty sure that would just be "aggressive". Plus, there's the fact that you're so spineless and disingenuous (or should I say "witty" and "snarky") that you couldn't possibly be called anything other than passive aggressive, but it's alright, it's a common mistake. ^_^

Also, please learn to read. I don't remember writing anything about anyone's "brother".

MadassAlex · 2011-08-20 03:50:22

I'm so confused.

Malkavian · 2011-08-20 03:52:53

Don't worry, Madass! I'll be your guide!

(disappears except for a creepy grin)

Bob · 2011-08-20 03:53:13

Oops, my bad, of course you were talking about my father and not my non-existent brother! And I'm sure that that particular part of your rant (nice one, BTW!) has absolutely nothing to do with that edit you made a few minutes ago. :P

I'm sure Google would beg to differ as far as aggressive-aggressive not being a "thing". But, you're right, I'm totally not aggressive enough. Any tips on how to rectify that? ^_^

DonZabu · 2011-08-20 03:54:50

>I'm totally not aggressive enough. Any tips on how to rectify that? ^_^

I have an idea:

~~Catfight.~~

Malkavian · 2011-08-20 03:55:44

I have a better idea:

rob a bank. Then you'll have enough money that no one can tell you what to do.

Mr_Ant · 2011-08-20 03:58:27

Right, because someone can't edit a post to fix their grammar or anything. Face it, you're delusional, and this isn't the only example of that. But, thanks for the complement, totally appreciated.

Hate to break it to you babe, but Google isn't the authority on everything. I know, it's soooo much easier to just Google something than just pick up a book or at least stop being such a total dumbass, but that doesn't mean everything that shows up on Google is right. But by all means, continue to ignore this advice and use the "I'm feeling lucky" button as the answer to every problem ever, it's been working out great for you so far.

Let's see, you could try not being so fake and two-faced about everything. Or, better yet, just stop posting! I'm sure you'll be better received around here if you do.

Counterclock · 2011-08-20 03:58:53

Bob insulting Bob.

~~I am ashamed to say that I like bob now.~~

Malkavian · 2011-08-20 04:02:06

I am too drunk for this thread.

Or more likely not drunk enough.

Bob · 2011-08-20 04:03:33

Well, I wouldn't know, I usually don't have many problems with grammar or sentence structure or any of that. You see, I actually paid attention in elementary English. But, it's cool, you know I still love you, my silly little goose. <3 Also, what's that about me being delusional again? I'm not the one who thinks I have a brother. Come on, you know me better than that, honey.

No, I totally understand. Of course those thousands of pages referencing aggressive-aggressive behavior are wrong and untrustworthy. Not like anyone put any work into any of those. I mean, what makes an "expert" any different from any other idiot with a computer and internet access, amirite guiz?

I'm so sorry I come across as fake! I totally didn't mean it, honest! Here, how about I tell you exactly I think about you?

JEALOUS BITCH

There, nothing fake about that.

Schitzo · 2011-08-20 04:03:37

Bah. Is Schitzo gonna have to rape a bitch?

Counterclock · 2011-08-20 04:06:30

Why am I jealous?

Nothing you did here was even worth the time of me clicking on the thread.

If anything, I'm just disappointed.

Mr_Ant · 2011-08-20 04:07:48

Right, my bad, you're totally not delusion. Of course you're as awesome and pretty and smart and "pimpin'" s you think you are, you actually do have friends, you don't want to do naughty things to your roommate while she's asleep, and you're not another raving Homestuck fangirl. I don't know how I ever made that mistake. And of course I'm jealous! Why can't I be as hated, err, I mean, loved and respected as you? My entire life is meaningless, I might as well do an acrobatic fucking pirouette off of a bridge right now. ;_;

Bob · 2011-08-20 04:11:54

Not you, clock, you silly thing you. <3

I get it now, Ant! The OP was just you complaining about all the things that I'm not but you wish I were! You're intimidated by me, aren't you? It's okay to say yes, I won't be mad in the slightest. ^_^

Counterclock · 2011-08-20 04:14:10

Bobby G, Bob, Mr_Ant.

Desu

Gomen Nasai.

I am sorry Mr. Ant-kun, but I disagree that Bob is a train, Bob is quite obviously a plane, or maybe a person, I don't know, I remember learning of trains when I was young, I had a friend, her name was Lilah, she was a good friend,

But she turned to a life of drugs, It was sad, now I am sad for recollecting thoughts.

Mr_Ant · 2011-08-20 04:15:15

Well, what's there not to be intimidated by? Who isn't intimidated by bipolar bloodthirsty manic screaming psycho whores? Half the time, I'm afraid you'll pop out of my monitor and bite my head clean off. X_X

Bob · 2011-08-20 04:19:54

bipolar bloodthirsty manic screaming psycho whores

Correction: Insane bipolar bloodthirsty hyper manic twisted PMSing screaming psycho dickbiting lesbian whores. But, I get you. Don't worry, I cound never hurt you. ~~If I ever lost you, who else would I be able to point and laugh at?~~

Counterclock · 2011-08-20 04:21:43

Kleptomania, Pyromaniac, Bi-polar, Mentally retarded, Eating disorder.

Mr_Ant · 2011-08-20 04:24:19

Thank you so much for the clarification! Now I can be more specific when someone asks what traits someone would need to possess before they could be called the worst person alive!

I guess if you ever lost me, you could just look in a mirror. Speaking of which, just curious, but what's it feel like to have the rack of a five year old Indian boy?

^I see you already know Bob pretty well.

MadassAlex · 2011-08-20 04:26:20

So are these two married or what?

Counterclock · 2011-08-20 04:27:29

Mr_Ant is Bob's attempt at being Vorpy.

Me, I'm not trying to be anyone but myself, and I'm a little tired of the Vorpyism going around.

Bob · 2011-08-20 04:28:37

Thank you so much for the clarification! Now I can be more specific when someone asks what traits someone would need to possess before they could be called the worst person alive!

To be even more specific, you could include "annoyingly persistent, clingy, jealous-hearted, loud-mouthed, petty, hypocritical", etc.

what's it feel like to have the rack of a five year old Indian boy?

Iunno, but I bet if you asked your boyfriend, he could tell you what it feels like to grope someone with the rack of a five year old boy. ;3

Counterclock · 2011-08-20 04:31:20

Bob's boyfriend is a 5-year old Indian boy?

Jeez Bob, watch out, Ian's a mod now, he's got the power to crack down.

Mr_Ant · 2011-08-20 04:32:22

^^^I'm not attempting to be anyone. And who the hell is Vorpy?

^^As well as "whiny", "boring", "slutty", "obnoxious", "in denial", etc.

Can't say I have a boyfriend, but it's still good to know that if I did have one, you'd go out of your way to fuck him like the little whore you are!

Bradamante · 2011-08-20 04:36:02

Get out, Mr. Ant. You are being waaaaaaaaay too negative, even for this forum.

Bob · 2011-08-20 04:36:02

^^^Lol, you read that completely wrong. At least you're still better at reading than some people, though, so it's alright.

^^I imagine I wouldn't really have to go out of my way to fuck your boyfriend. I've heard what a terrible lay you are. Just know that I totally feel sorry for you. Just remember, if you can't get laid, you can't be insulted for being awful in the sack, so you're probably fine.

^Nah, (s)he can stay, I'm rather enjoying our little debate.

Schitzo · 2011-08-20 04:38:31

This just gets easier and easier to masturbate to.

Mr_Ant · 2011-08-20 04:39:48

You know there's a difference between not being able to get laid and not wanting to have sex with everything that moves, right? I totally understand if you don't, it's such a hard distinction to make, especially for someone with your... Issues.

Well, I should really be going to sleep now. You see, I actually have things to do tomorrow. While you'll still be in bed past noon, I'll be up trying to do something productive (fascinating word, really, look it up). Bye! ^_^

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