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Robotnik

edited 2011-08-13 12:28:12 in Wonderful posts
☭Unstoppable Sex Goddess☭
Dr. Ivo Robotnik (Dr. Rrrrrr-obotnik in the way he pronounces it. Not to be confused with Dr. Eggman, his faggoty game counter-part) is the Final Boss of all furfags in every dimension. Despite being a morbidly-obese Ginger, he isn't a force you would want to fuck with. Dr. Robotnik is responsible for the glorious memes you know as Pingas and Double Nigger, which proves of how much a fucking genius this guy is. As Hitler burned millions of Jews, Robotnik did the same but instead with furries(both of which were in need of instant extermination). However, like Hitler, Robotnik's plans were thwarted and his reign was demolished. This Robotnik was very different from all the others that came before and after him and didn't receive much attention until the day "Pingas" became a meme. From then on, he became favored amongst the YouTube Poop community as this Robotnik, as well as the show he starred in, Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog, were easily exploitable and thus created a good amount of lulz. Many of his infamous catchphrases such as "I HATE THAT HEDGEHOG!" or "I'll have to give myself a Prrrrrrrmotion!" were also spammed a whole fuckload of times before they became as loose and full of AIDS much like Sarah Palin's vagina. Unfortunately, the meme has seen less usage as newfags continued to use the living hell out of it like they have done with just about anything else. Today, Robotnik can found working at his local McDonald's striving to make a living seeing as he lost his job due to the budget cuts made from the harsh economy. Much to his dismay, he preferred to work at Wiener Schnitzel since they have dick shaped food only to find out they had no opening jobs left. As for his assistants Grounder and Scrather, they now work as discreet prostitutes selling their services on Craigslist. Unfortunately, they have been caught in a sting mission from the Feds and are now serving a 15-year sentence in a state prison. That, however, has not stopped them from selling their bodies for mere sexual pleasures as it is easier for them to sell themselves for a cigarette or two in the showers. The Origins SNOOPING AS USUAL I SEE? It all started in an episode of The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog titled "Boogey-Mania", in which Dr. Ivo Robotnik said the unforgettable words "SNOOPING AS USUAL I SEE?", which had a slight emphasis on the "PINGAS" part. Of course, no one noticed the bit until the hilarious YouTubers behind YouTube Poop discovered AOSTH which was around 2007. It didn't take too long until many of them abused that scene within their videos, with about 99% of them being a copypasta of the last but with a slight twist. Practically the same shit in every video in a nutshell. Since then, it has been a popular fad and people started laughing their asses off hearing some fat dude with an oversized mustache and an IQ of at least 10 say the word "Penis". After the show was cancelled and went bankrupt, Dr. Robotnik was out of a job and was in desperate need of one. After Grounder and Scratcher departed him, he was all alone withering in a path of deep-depression and heavy intoxication. He was nearly arrested on multiple accounts for public masturbation as he had no where else to fap when the going got tough. He couldn't take refuge within his mother's house like he did for the first 30 years of his life because his mom was fed up that he couldn't get a job even after receiving a doctorate from Harvard. But on one hopeful day, in the blistering cold winter, Robotnik was able to find himself a job as a Santa in a near-by mall. Unfortunately, he was quickly fired after attemtping to solicit a young boy to touch his "PINESS".

Comments

  • ☭Unstoppable Sex Goddess☭
    After the show was cancelled and went bankrupt, Dr. Robotnik was out of a job and was in desperate need of one. After Grounder and Scratcher departed him, he was all alone withering in a path of deep-depression and heavy intoxication. He was nearly arrested on multiple accounts for public masturbation as he had no where else to fap when the going got tough. He couldn't take refuge within his mother's house like he did for the first 30 years of his life because his mom was fed up that he couldn't get a job even after receiving a doctorate from Harvard. But on one hopeful day, in the blistering cold winter, Robotnik was able to find himself a job as a Santa in a near-by mall. Unfortunately, he was quickly fired after attemtping to solicit a young boy to touch his "PINESS".

    As the years went by, Robotnik discovered crack cocaine and decided to become an atheist as he had nothing to better to do but sit all day in the public library and complain about religion. There, he had met Sonic, noticing his surgeries and how he looked even gayer than before. On this occurrence, Robotnik discovered he was replaced by a faggot going by the name of Dr. Eggman. The discovery quickly enraged him, but he couldn't do anything about it as he was now a nobody. All the rage tired him out and Robotnik decided to convert to Catholicism in hopes of becoming a priest and having the chances to molest any young boy he wanted. As he was overqualified for the job, he was quickly denied and decided to work at a fast food restaurant.
  • ☭Unstoppable Sex Goddess☭
    The AoStH version of Robotnik differs greatly between all of his other gay animu carnations. One of the main differences is that this Robotnik provides comic relief as the creators were hoping in creating a funny character. To much surprise, the creators unintentionally managed to create what is quite possibly the first intentional unintentionally funny character to ever be made. Many wouldn't find Robotnik funny until the start of his YouTube days.

    In the show, Robotnik constantly seeks vengeance on Sonic, protector of furries and their homoerotic pictures despite the fact that all furries are "no good". As the creators would like everybody to believe that Sonic is the good guy and Robotnik being the antagonist, the role of hero and villain is actually the other way around. What the creators of said show didn't want you to know that Robotnik is actually the protector of great justice and purity and that the furry menace must be punished for corrupting the world with its traced fanart that nobody wants to see.

    Robotnik is, however, not alone in his quest of exterminating all the furries within the realms of Mobius. He is joined by his in the closet lackies, Scratcher, an oversized robotic cock, and Grounder, a green drill with a pointy dildo attached to his face. Both try to gain Robotnik's love, approval, and a Prrrrrrrrrromotion ever since the incident that Robotnik found out he couldn't see his own penis due to his blubber blocking it. The traumatic experience forced him to chop off his own pingas and donate it to a local Children's Hospital as a toy to those suffering from leukemia. Then there is the monkey robot named Coconuts, another useless robot wanting Robotnik's penis.

    There are also episodes in which explain the unrevealed origins of this sadistic obese evil Genius. It was revealed in an episode that his mother is a single parent and was impregnated at the age of 14. As desperate as Dr. Robotnik's mother was, she was able to find one guy willing to fuck her seeing as she was ugly as shit (she looks exactly like Dr. Robotnik, but with big tits and some eyelashes). Although there are no evidence of this, it is theorized that Robotnik's mother had a virgin birth and that he is the re-incarnation of Jesus Christ. Just like his mother, Robotnik too was lonely and desperate for some dick up his ass. But apparently, no one was willing to give him any except his robot drones, all who were already used as sex toys. Since Dr. Robotnik wanted a heir to his already shitted empire, he decided to create a robot son since even if he could acquire dick, there would be no way faggots can reproduce. Therefroe, Robotnik Jr. was created, only to betray his father and become a furfag himself thus angering Robotnik into committing suicide.

    Oh, and he's voiced by some Britfag who died from cancer.
  • Kichigai birthday!!
    Why are you copypasting Encyclopedia Dramatica articles?
  • ☭Unstoppable Sex Goddess☭
    shhhhhut up baka
  • Copypasta?

    I was not eating original pasta?

    B ^ U
  • Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human
    > Oh, and he's voiced by some Britfag who died from cancer.

    Fuck the writer and fuck you the copier for insulting Long John Baldry.
  • ☭Unstoppable Sex Goddess☭
    I should give myself a trrrrrrrrrrrollmotion!
  • ...I'm not sure whether I should be honoured or insulted by this thread
  • We were wrong, so very wrong. Oh Internet cannot be as bad as this, it just can't.
  • Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human
    Robuttnik's butt


  • Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human
  • edited 2011-08-13 20:58:53
    They call me Rate Miser, whatever I see... turns overrated in my eyes...
    The creator of AoSH Robotnik apparently wanted him to be "animation's sexiest fat man" (Not safe for work). I wish I was making this up.
  • Robotnik's buttocks weave sensuously
  • ^^ Well, I always did have a way with the ladies. *does a sensual dance*
  • HAY VORPY

    Post ED's article on me, I want to see what they have to say about me and I can't look at the site for myself because I'm worried about malware and shit.
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