The Concept of "Being Ugly"

AHR

This has bugged me for quite a while.

The fact that so many people seem convinced that they are just "not that good looking" and then decide, whelp, that's their lot in life, as one of the ugly ones, and proceed to complain about how they can never get a girl/guy/both.

This is total bullshit.

Yes, some people do look more attractive naturally, but no matter how naturally beautiful one looks, it can easily be shifted by the choices one makes.

Proper hygiene, proper fashion choices (which is more than just a t shirt and shorts) and taking proper care of ones skin and hair in a way that benefits the overall look of your body can have TREMENDOUS effects on your overall image.

But, nooooo.

You're just too ugly to look good

MillerCross

A lot of it is lack of self esteem making people into self defeating people who somehow think there's no chance in hell their problems could be fixed.

Myrmidon

I hate people who talk about how ugly they are on the photos thread.

So very much.

AHR

JC: But that's the majority of people. I mean, I was just telling Cakman the other day that I see myself as overweight in certain places, even though I know it's irrational.

Hell, even people in Hollywood have those problems. It's why plastic surgery is such a biggie.

Kino

@AHR: See that would require them to make an effort at combating the problem, but that's very unlikely to happen; people are more content to sit and bitch.

AHR

But it's so stuuuupid!

--proceeds to sit and bitch about it--

Myrmidon

Mind, you, some people really are kind of hopelessly unattractive.

Not many, though.

AHR

AGH HOLY WHAT THE FUCK.

Well, ok, anyone here who looks like that can get a free pass.

...although, with for-the-good plastic surgery nowadays...

GLORIOUSLeader

Aww Myrm, I was gonna post a pic of that guy.

AHR

So uh...wha'd the guy have?

Kino

You mean other than sarcasm, and a hot ginger gf?

GLORIOUSLeader

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_Merrick

Oh, and he had a movie about his life narrated by David Lynch. As you can imagine, it was a playful romp through fields of sunshine and rainbows. 

Myrmidon

ninja

Kino

@AHR: Have you actually told those people that they're full of shit and all they need to do is work on their hygiene and self-confidence?

MillerCross

Ninjas.

AHR

Kino: When I get the opportunity to. 

I made a whole rant about it.

In my EGS blog.

Which almost nobody actually reads so...yeah.

Usually, when outside of blog-work, I tend to try to be nicer about it.

RedEyedAbyss

"Which almost nobody actually reads so...yeah."

More than 5 comments per blog post across more than 100 posts is no one reading?

AHR

Hm?

Oh, most of those comments come back when it was still a thread on the liveblogs section. My readership plummeted once the move was made.

Now it's two people per entry

RedEyedAbyss

I'd still sell my (metaphorical) soul to get that much.

AHR

I did sell my soul :O.

Well, actually, it was more of bitch about EGS so much in the actual thread, that there was a bleed-over.

Kino

EGS?

MillerCross

El Goonish Shive.

Kino

The fuck is that?

GLORIOUSLeader

Some crappy webcomic. 

Kino

Ah; never mind then.

AHR

So, lets start with the simple fact that what both Diane and Nanase say are total bullshit, and not for bad characterization reasons or plot reasons but because of real life and meta reasons. Now that we have that out of the way, I begin. Since the day females are born, they are advertized and given everything they could ever possibly want to look attractive. Make-up is just the tip of the iceberg. Stores upon stores of designer niche clothing, formal, casual and everything in between. They...we... have entire rows of shelves devoted to types of shampoos and conditioners. Oh sure, men have it too, but not like we do. Just going off of wikipedia, the entire list of cosmetics is: Lip gloss, lip liner, lip plumper, lipstick, concealer, foundation, face-powder, bindi, thanaka, tilaka, cleanser-toner-moisturizer, eye liner, eye shadow, kohl, mascara, shampoo-conditioner-styling cream, nail polish, anti-aging cream, body powder, cold cream and sindoor. We have comsetic treatments: Cosmetic surgery, botox, facial, bleaching, manicure, pedicure, hair removal (waxing-threading-shaving) and hair styling. I'm not done. Jewelry: Anklet, belt buckle, belly chain, bracelet, brooch, chatelaine, crown, cufflink, earring, lapel pin, necklace, pendant, ring, tiara, tie clip, collar pin and a pocket watch. Note how all the male jewelry are almost ONLY for formal occasions. We can't forget the accessories, can we? Belts, purses, handbags, scarfs, legwarmers, sunglasses, and leggings. There are 100 or so possible pages for fashion magazines on wikipedia. 16 of them are for males.

Now, that we have this long long long list, I am going to let you in on a little secret. Females are just as ugly as males. If you are a male, I have a question. Do you think you are ugly? Unattractive? Congratulations, you're normal, most girls think so as well. That's not the point. The point is when you guys assume this, you decide it's somehow not your fault. You can either lose weight or...or find a girl uglier than you. It's always about weight. Blame the weight. All its fault. That or shaving, usually. But it's usually the weight. You're too fat, you're too skinny, you don't have enough muscle, what else have you. Or maybe you assume you have an ugly face, and there is no way to escape it. But you see, that is not true. The truth is you're self victimizing yourself and you're also lazy. Do you want to look attractive? Really? Instead of waking up ten minutes before you need to go to work or class, wake up an hour before, take a shower, take care of your hair if it's long enough to flop it around, and then go into your closet and pick clothes that look nice. No, not the shirt with hilarious internet meme on it, I mean an actual nice shirt, and not one meant for formal occasions either. If you managed to find one, try to find one that doesn't clash pattern or color wise with your complexion, build or other clothes. Stumped? Wait, not done. Since males don't wear makeup, you obviously don't have to do anything of the sort, but you better have concealer ready to cover any type of acne or those bags under your eyes. Wearing shorts? Better shave your legs. Wearing short sleeve shirts? Shave your armpits. If you actually have stylable hair, it's time you learned how to use some mousse and a comb. Then of course the deodorant. Make sure to keep it with you at all times, I know your pockets are deep enough to hold them. Then you need to take care of your hands and your nails. No nail polish needed, just a nail buffer. Now, you are ready to leave. Seems like a lot of work right? That's because it fucking is.

You're bullshit idea of natural beauty is a myth, got that? Fucking nonexistant. "Oh look at me, I'm a male, I don't like girls with makeup!" Guess what, shit for brains? Chances are, those 'natural' girls you ogle ARE wearing makeup. Unlike the ones that you derided though, they know how to use make up correctly. They know how to style their hair so it doesn't look like bed head or full of hair spray. And you know what? They don't do it for you. They never have. They never will. Girls do not. look attractive. because of males. Do they WANT to be attractive if they desire a male's attention? Yes. But that is not why they dress like that. That is not why they wear make up. They go through all this trouble to get ready and look nice because it has been hammered into our heads since day one that this is how women are supposed to look. Go take your pants off. Now go to the store and buy milk. What? You don't want to do it? Is it because you think girls won't find you attractive? No. And it's similar logic for the whole fucked up morning process girls go through. Hell, they usually do it more for other girls than they do for males.

And let me tell you, girls who don't care how they look? They are "ugly." And no, I don't mean "I'm gonna dye my hair pink! I don't care if it clashes with my green middrift!" I mean "didn't take a shower, I have six inches of frizzy hair, and no clean clothes. Oh well. Headband and over sized sweatshirt FTW." Of course, what's really sad is that headband is probably more effort than what guys do.

Now that I have ranted about ALL of this, I want you to go back to this strip. I want you to reread this strip. I want you to keep this knowledge in mind and read it. Now I want you to pretend the situation is with males instead of females. Imagine a guy is wearing an oversized sweatshirt, hair untouched (ponytail is not high on the levels of attractiveness. Ponytail usually means bad hairday or jock.) and is being told he is attractive by someone dressed like this◊.

That was a really good ranting day, for me.

nohaynicklibre

You seemed upset

AHR

Naw. That was a few months ago. Heheheh. ^_^

LouieW

AHR,
The fact that so many people seem convinced that they are just "not that good looking" and then decide, whelp, that's their lot in life, as one of the ugly ones, and proceed to complain about how they can never get a girl/guy/both.

I think the first part of that makes some sense. For example, if you know you are never going to have "model quality" looks (for whatever reason) then I feel like it is reasonable to not fret over that stuff as much. I agree with you that good hygiene is important though and I definitely think that people should try to be healthy.

The second part just seems kind of silly to me though. I find complaining about how one cannot get a girlfriend/boyfriend largely pointless. While it might be something worth venting to a close friend/acquaintance, I do not think that telling other people online will do much good. If anything, I feel like people might believe you are rather self-centered, especially if you talk about it a lot.

Basically, if you are going to actually really care about physical appearances for the sake of attracting a girlfriend/boyfriend, then I think that it is reasonable for you to put effort into working on how you look. If you want to not care about that stuff that much then I still believe that you should focus on having good hygiene and try to pick up some healthy habits. Still, that is ultimately up to the individual to decide and I hope I have not sounded like I know all the answers here.

Kino

Who the fuck is that dude?

AHR

Random male model.