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Wanting to die

AHRAHR
edited 2011-06-08 22:06:52 in Meatspace
But knowing you lack the balls to do it the quick way, and the patience to do it the slow way.
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Comments

  • One foot in front of the other, every day.
    It's been a fair while since I actually wanted to kill myself.

    Hooray.
  • You can change. You can.
    Ouch, why are you feeling like this, AHR?
  • An intense depression brought on by the fact that I am in the minority (and by minority, I mean only me) opinion, and thus means that everything I lived for to this day for the past five years has been a complete lie.
  • What do you mean by the slow way?
  • Minority opinion on what?
  • Just eat those calorie crazy foods that you keep linking to then.
  • edited 2011-06-08 22:13:58
    Loser
    I think that ending one's own life is just plain stupid and mean because it almost always means harming other people who want you to be around (i.e. your loved ones). That being said, I think that when people actually consider committing suicide, they are not in the best mental state. I believe those people deserve sympathy and need someone to help them rather than scold them.

  • edited 2011-06-08 22:12:39
    When in Turkey, ROCK THE FUCK OUT
    Use Immorgamsics.

    /obscure

    Also ^
  • AHRAHR
    edited 2011-06-08 22:13:29
    Don: No. Not falling for that again. Last time I brought it up, it brought about an intense depression for the above reasons.

    Louie: Too true. Doesn't mean I'm selfless enough to not do it though. Just too cowardly.
  • edited 2011-06-08 22:12:50
    Tableflipper
    ^^^ oh snap, that was pretty damn straightforward
  • I'm a damn twisted person
    Just throwing this out there, but have you considered calling up the suicide hotline*? They might have a more immediate effect on you than listen to people online trot out tired platitudes, if only because you are hearing a voice.

    *Wow their site design is so 90s.
  • I know I won't do it. I am terrified of pointy things. 
  • One foot in front of the other, every day.
    An intense depression brought on by the fact that I am in the minority
    (and by minority, I mean only me) opinion, and thus means that
    everything I lived for to this day for the past five years has been a
    complete lie.



    Welcome to adulthood, enjoy your stay.
  • You can change. You can.
    I know I won't do it. I am terrified of pointy things. 

    Juse because you think you won't kill yourself doesn't mean that you shouldn't call...
  • Lovely. Now I can go to college knowing I'm destined for a crappy minimum wage job with no ambitions for the rest of my life.

    Maybe cyanide could be obtainable...
  • edited 2011-06-08 22:19:33

    ^^^ You're not helping.

  • I guess all I can say is that you really ought to think about it. Remember, such a decision is permanent.
  • edited 2011-06-08 22:22:07
    When in Turkey, ROCK THE FUCK OUT
    ^^^ Actually, real cyanide is fairly hard to obtain.

    Besides, everybody's had to work a crappy minimum wage job at some point or another. College is not a single, set path. 
  • AHRAHR
    edited 2011-06-08 22:22:18
    ^^...that makes it sound even better, to be honest.
  • AHR,
    Too true. Doesn't mean I'm selfless enough to not do it though. Just too cowardly.

    I think that what you call cowardice may partially be respect for the feelings of others that is holding you back, but whatever.

    An intense depression brought on by the fact that I am in the minority
    (and by minority, I mean only me) opinion, and thus means that
    everything I lived for to this day for the past five years has been a
    complete lie.


    I do not really understand what you mean by this, so I would really appreciate it if you could elaborate a bit. I understand if you do not feel comfortable doing that, but I do think it would help you feel better.


  • You can change. You can.
    Lovely. Now I can go to college knowing I'm destined for a crappy minimum wage job with no ambitions for the rest of my life.

    We all have to do that at some point. Life is full of high and lows, AHR. There's no point in complaining about them, they are bound to come...just try to get yourself back on your feet.

    Think of it all the missed chance, think of all the things you could do, think of all the people who love you, think of everything that life could be if you keep on living.

    Life is a bitch sometimes, other times, it can be a nice girl. It all depends on how you treat her.
  • AHRAHR
    edited 2011-06-08 22:32:03
    W: If you're that curious, just go to the random thoughts thread, page 3036, read the ensuing conversation, and I'd tell you to feel free to laugh at my patheticness, but I know that I can't really apply that joke to you as well as I could anyone else.
  • edited 2011-06-08 22:41:42
    Tableflipper
    Welcome to adulthood,

    minority opinion
    o_o
  • If you must eat a phoenix, boil it, do not roast it. This only encourages their mischievous habits.
    That advice was stupid.

    The finished project is what will make your audience happy.

    Everything involved in the writing of the story is your choice, to be done as YOU please.

    -shrug- If you want to brainstorm and focus on technical issues, do so. Just remember to shape it into something audiences enjoy and you're set.
  • One foot in front of the other, every day.
    You're not helping.

    Life is just like that. Sometimes, you have to let go of what is the efficient path, or the most objectively successful path to chase what makes you, personally, happy. The biggest struggle of my own early adult life has been separating expectations from reality and what's actually good for me.

    A lot of the time, this means working some shitty jobs for cash while you figure things out.

    Look, that whole expectation -- go to college/uni at 18, get a degree by 21, go on to a successful career instantly -- is an unrealistic ideal that hurts a lot of intelligent young people with a lot of potential. It's really important that you make your decisions for yourself.

    The above was derived from the whole concept that ambitions are tied to college at the seams. This is reality, not some P&P game. Things can work in unexpected ways, especially when you least expect it.
  • go to college/uni at 18, get a degree by 21, go on to a successful career instantly

    Wait.

    What.

    People tend to expect that?
  • >It's really important that you make your decisions for yourself.

    As opposed to...? How does that tie into the whole expectation thing?

  • One foot in front of the other, every day.
    As opposed to making decisions based on what other people expect.
  • edited 2011-06-08 22:54:36
    Loser
    AHR,

    Thank you for giving me more information about that (or at least telling me where to find it). I was actually a bit relieved once I found out what was bothering you because I could definitely understand why that would trouble you. I mean, I think your written work is kind of like your own baby (a brainchild if you will) or a part of yourself. I hope this does not sound like I am just spouting off about something about which I know nothing, but I believe that Cygan is right about this. I think that a lot of writing skill is related to practice. If you stop, I think that will only make you more depressed.

    From what I can tell, you are (and were) deeply invested in your work so when people are annoyed about a significant aspect of it, I think it makes sense for you to feel bad about that so I definitely think you should not feel bad about that.

    I wish I had better advice to give here though. I am afraid that I am no expert on writing, so I cannot really offer anything specific to that subject, unfortunately. Basically, I guess all I can say is that things will get better, even if they do not get better in the way that you might expect.
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