Freaking out over a job interview

Bob

"What should I wear? Hmm, this skirt looks nice. But... no, they won't like the color. Maybe this one? Nah, too long, they'll think I'm boring. How about this- Oh god no! This is way too short! They won't want to hire someone they think is a slut! Should I wear pants? Nah, nah, I'll just stick with a skirt. Maybe... this one? Eh, I'll decide later.

What should I do with my hair? Hmm... Should I wear a headband? Wait, no! Stupid Bob, they'll think you're some immature valley girl or something! What's wrong with you? I can't just leave it like this! This isn't professional! Maybe a ponytail will do the trick... I can't go in these shoes, they're too... Ugh, no. Will they even see the shoes? Can't take any risks. Maybe these? Fuck, a size too small. Maybe these? No, no, no. Oh, if only these were black, they'd be perfect.

Oh, I'll never get a job! I'll just be another worthless brat living off of her father's money and not contributing anything to society! I should just throw myself off of the nearest bridge and get it over with! Where is the nearest bridge, anyway? Hmm, too far away, maybe I'll just jump off of a particularly high hill. But, I couldn't do it in this, I mean, I'd want to look good if I know someone's going to find me dead somewhere. Wait, what was I thinking about at first? Oh god, the interview! I've gotta go fix my hair! Aaaaah!"

InsanityAddict

IJBM: People who worry about how they'll look rather than body language and the interview itself in these cases.

Bob

>implying I don't worry about body language and how the interview will go

>implying I don't already spend enough time wondering if I'll accidentally say something stupid or start stuttering or slouch or do something else that would make me look like an idiot

>implying I don't have enough to worry about as it is

>implying I'm so image obsessed idiot who doesn't care what she says or does or how she's perceived by others, especially in a professional environment

IJBM: IJBMers / tropers being so elitist and arrogant.

vacasama

May I ask what the job is?

Bob

It's for a gelato place downtown, near my college.

InsanityAddict

>implying you didn't give of that impression

>implying your priorities aren't skewed

>implying your worries would actually be alleviated by IJBM

>implying you aren't image-obsessed with the constant worrying about coming across as a dick on the forum

/annoying wiseass mode: worries never go away, and they don't judge you on that overmuch(if it's a job were you have customers, it counts a tad more). Dressing a tad formal is enough most of the time on the appearance front.

IanExMachina

Just go for professional looking.

Also as long as you are polite and calm at the interview you should be ok.

As after all the interviewers are human too.

FrodoGoofballCoTV

I try to keep in mind that there are plenty of jobs, and you only need one.  But yeah. If you have self esteem issues already, job hunting feels like it's designed to point out how pathetic you are.

I hate job hunting.
- Virginia 'Pepper' Potts, Iron Man, the movie.

I heard somewhere there's an anchient curse, that goes something like:
"May you become so desperate that you will go to the slave market to sell yourself, and no one will buy you."

Bob

^^^Might I ask, what's the point of pointing out that you think my priorities are skewed? Do you think I'm just some shallow douche and that you can somehow miraculously change that or something?

^^Humans that are trained to nitpick and look for the worst in people.

Vorpy

I worried about the same thing. The interviewer just said "come to work as appealing and neat as possible.". I think he was hitting on me?

vacasama

Is this your first job interview?

Bob

Far from it.

TheMightyAnonym

>Hmm, this skirt looks nice.

BOB IS A GIRL?!

InsanityAddict

>Implying you don't cultivate that image yourself based on the avatar

>Implying I ever said anything about wanting to 'change' anyone instead of pointing and laughing

A job interview is meant to determine whether a job suits you or not, based on presentation, demeanor and previous qualifications. It's not meant to judge you as a human being. It's never your last chance, and every failure is a learning experience.

vacasama

The only thing I can say stay calm and pay attention.  I think looking at the interviewer's eyes when talking might help.

When's the interview?

Vorpy

BOB'S A GIRL?!

suddenly transsexuals and creepy fucks don't exist anymore to justify this deduction? Absurd.

Yup. She has (lol small) boobs and a somewhat (mediocre) vagina.

Bob

^^^So somehow, my avatar on here defines me as a human being?

^^Tomorrow at two.

InsanityAddict

Yes, it does. You need to channel your inner Panty, who does not give two shits about what the job interviewers think of her, and isn't shy about asserting her qualities that make her suitable for the job.

Bob

So, you're saying that I am a shallow douche based on my avatar, but it's a good thing?

Vorpy

No, he is saying you should indirectly seduce the interviewers.

InsanityAddict

Shallowness is good in any job in which you have to deal with customers, but you have not fully embraced your doucheness yet, limiting your potential.

Bob

So, you're saying that I'm more than shallow enough, but not douchy enough, or that I am douchy enough but have yet to capture my true douche potential? How shallow are we talking here, anyway?

InsanityAddict

Higher than interjecting 'whatever' often, but lower than saying 'Oh my God' out loud.

TheMightyAnonym

"Yup."

Whoa, now I wanna see a picture or something...