I'm not super-tech-savvy

Magus

I need to get off the Internet. I'm starting to feel bad for not being so good with computers that I can avoid personal information crises before they begin/jailbreak my printer/talk about copyright ethics without feeling like a strawman.

I just want to press buttons and make letters show up! Why do I need to do more than that?!

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Because people are assholes.

Bob

I'm not quite seeing the connection there.

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"personal information crises before they begin"

This wouldn't exist if people couldn't be assholes.

...also what the hell does jailbreaking a printer do?

Magus

It allows me to print things THE MAN wouldn't normally allow me to print and access its hidden potential.

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Who is THE MAN?

"access its hidden potential"

Will it turn into a supernatural sentinent machine that can shoot lasers that draw directly on shirts, never run out of power and bring pictures to life?

Bob

You've seriously never heard the phrase "the man" before?

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I think I recall hearing it from some movie but I forgot the context.

Bob