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IJBM: Bacon

glennmagusharveyglennmagusharvey
edited 2015-10-03 22:33:03 in Meatspace
Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human
Literally meat-space topic.

Time spent to prepare bacon for human consumption: 5-20 minutes, depending on how you do it.
Time spent to consume bacon: 1-10 minutes.
Time spent to clean up afterwards and deal with a large profusion of bacon grease all over the place: 45-90 minutes.

Next time, please use the toaster oven.

Comments

  • BeeBee
    edited 2015-10-04 00:32:16
    Either use a griddle, or fry your eggs in the bacon grease for taste and to pick some of it up.

    If you use a pan, fill it with water and dish soap and go do something else for an hour.  Stuff wipes right out.
  • glennmagusharveyglennmagusharvey
    Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human
    The flatmate apparently sorta-burned it and ended up producing bacon-flavored "smoke" (as he described it).

    I awoke hours later to find that basically everything in the kitchenette was covered with a fine white mist.  All of which was bacon grease.
  • BeeBee
    edited 2015-10-04 03:11:33
    Oh fuck that.  My condolences.  I'd like to amend my previous instructions with "don't cook things hard enough to vaporize grease."

    Do you not have a filter above the stove?
  • glennmagusharveyglennmagusharvey
    Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human
    Nope.  It's a portable single-burner induction stove.

    I should have been more careful after that time he thought that splashing water into a hot wok (like they do on TV) and then adding oil immediately afterwards was a good idea.
  • BeeBee
    maybe you shouldn't let this guy cook
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