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The Coachella Schedule

CountryPumpkinCountryPumpkin
edited 2012-04-15 13:27:36 in Meatspace
I clench my fists and yell "anime" towards an uncaring, absent God, and swear solemnly to press my thumbs into Chocolate America's eyeballs until he is blinded, to directly emasculate sporting figures, to beat the shit out of tumblr users with baseball bats, and to quietly appreciate what Waylon Smithers being gay means to me.

As much as I'm pissed I didn't go this year, some of these conflicts are just fucking beyond belief. This would be my plan for the weekend, had I gone. 



Go see LA Riots. Go to see Yuck and then hang around for Neon Indian. This means that I miss SebastiAn. Then stay around longer to see Girls, which means that I miss Death Grips. Run over to the Arctic Monkeys show. Go to see Frank Ocean and then The Rapture (I'd rather miss a little of The Rapture's show than the end of Frank Ocean's). Hang around for M83; now I have to miss Explosions in the Sky and the Black Keys. Stay for Refused.



Go to see We Were Promised Jetpacks. Then head on over to see just a little of Black Lips so I can see the entirety of Azealia Banks. I miss Destroyer. Then head on over to AWOLNATION before packing it as fast as I can so I don't miss a second of tUnE-yArDs. Go to see Machester Orchestra, which means that I miss Andrew Bird. Leave early to try and get a good seat to see Jeff Magnum, since I know it'll be packed (I'm still super pissed that I missed his show in Asbury Park). However, now I miss St. Vincent. This seems like the most blatantly terrible scheduling conflict of the whole weekend; I'm sure that there's a huge overlap between Magnum and St. Vincent fans, so why would they schedule their shows at the same time? And here's where the horror begins. Go to Flying Lotus, stay for most of SBTRKT, and run as fast as possible to Radiohead. In the process, I miss Godspeed You! Black Emperor, Feist, Bon Iver, the Shins, Kaskade, and A$AP Rocky.



I'm interested in absolutely nothing until 3, so maybe just wander around a bit. Head on over to Santigold and leave early to catch the entirety of Real Estate. Then see Wild Flag, which means that I miss araabMUSIK, Thundercat, and the Hives. Stay for the Weeknd and then sprint to Justice. Try to catch the rest of Company Flow. Now I'm missing Girl Talk and Beirut. Finally, go to see Dr. Dre and Snoop Dog.


Jesus. Fucking. Christ. I'm almost glad I couldn't go this year or any other year.

Comments

  • NyktosNyktos
    a little muffled

    I have heard of


    Maybe one third of these bands?

  • Wicked223Wicked223
    edited 2012-04-15 13:31:40
    We Played Some Open Chords and Rejoiced, For the Earth Had Circled the Sun Yet Another Year

    Goldenvoice in charge of scheduling, lol.


    ^Don't worry, nobody actually knows about all of the bands at any given music festival.

  • CountryPumpkinCountryPumpkin
    I clench my fists and yell "anime" towards an uncaring, absent God, and swear solemnly to press my thumbs into Chocolate America's eyeballs until he is blinded, to directly emasculate sporting figures, to beat the shit out of tumblr users with baseball bats, and to quietly appreciate what Waylon Smithers being gay means to me.

    The worst part is that yeah, I know that the big-name bands get the later times and the relative nobodies get earlier. But would it have been so goddamned impossible to get one or two of the names that obviously conflict, like Jeff Magnum/St. Vincent or Thundercat/Wild Flag/araabMUSIK/the Hives or Girl Talk/Company Flow/Beirut/At The Drive-In or Feist/Flying Lotus/David Guetta/Bon Iver/the Shins/Godspeed You! Black Emperor/Radiohead/Kaskade/A$AP Rocky to just move to an earlier spot? Like, just one of them?

  • Wicked223Wicked223
    We Played Some Open Chords and Rejoiced, For the Earth Had Circled the Sun Yet Another Year

    St. Vincent and Jeff Mangum at the same time was definitely a brainfart, but are the other ones really that bad? I don't really think that Feist and FlyLo have that much overlap in fanbase...

  • DonZabuDonZabu
    Holy smokes, I actually know who a lot of these people are.



    Thanks, Anthony Fantano!



    Anyway, I wish you could've gone and seen at least a fraction of those people.
  • CountryPumpkinCountryPumpkin
    I clench my fists and yell "anime" towards an uncaring, absent God, and swear solemnly to press my thumbs into Chocolate America's eyeballs until he is blinded, to directly emasculate sporting figures, to beat the shit out of tumblr users with baseball bats, and to quietly appreciate what Waylon Smithers being gay means to me.

    I suppose not. I'm just amazed that they didn't pander specifically to my tastes 


    The only other really stupid ones are Thundercat/araabMUZIK, Girl Talk/Company Flow and maybe M83 and Explosions in the Sky. Also, the Black Keys are headliners but they don't close out their night. Spectacular. 

  • Wicked223Wicked223
    edited 2012-04-15 14:15:41
    We Played Some Open Chords and Rejoiced, For the Earth Had Circled the Sun Yet Another Year
    Thanks, Anthony Fantano!

    i'm feelin' a light to decent 3 on this comment


     


    The only other really stupid ones are Thundercat/araabMUZIK, Girl Talk/Company Flow and maybe M83 and Explosions in the Sky. Also, the Black Keys are headliners but they don't close out their night. Spectacular.

    Don't know about Thundercat and araabMUZIK to judge that one, Girl Talk/Company Flow is... I don't know what they were thinking, and I'm neutral on the last one, honestly.

  • captainbrasscaptainbrass

    I'm just impressed Buzzcocks and Squeeze are still touring. Those guys must be at least 20 years older than me. And is Jimmy Cliff the reggae singer who did "Hard Road To Travel" etc. ? That's a long time ago now...

  • CountryPumpkinCountryPumpkin
    I clench my fists and yell "anime" towards an uncaring, absent God, and swear solemnly to press my thumbs into Chocolate America's eyeballs until he is blinded, to directly emasculate sporting figures, to beat the shit out of tumblr users with baseball bats, and to quietly appreciate what Waylon Smithers being gay means to me.

    Yep! Sticking him and Tim Armstrong right in between Girls and Neon Indian was a bit of a dick move, honestly. There may actually be some Girls fans mad about that.

  • IcalasariIcalasari
    edited 2012-04-15 14:26:48
    No rainbow star
    I have not heard of any of these guys



    Edit: Another look - I have heard of Dr Dre and Snoop Dog, and Girl Talk was a focus in a documentary on copyrights. Nobody else though
  • IronweaverIronweaver
    if u do convins fashist akwaint hiz faec w pavment neway jus 2 b sur

    I have heard of


    Maybe one third of these bands?



    This. Anyway, the artists that I know of and are in the lineup are pretty good. Also, there's more European stuff than I'd expected from an American music festival. Hope you have a good time.


    Speaking of music festivals, I should probably go to EXIT this year. The lineup is getting better and better each year, and the last few years have had terrific artists.


     

  • InsanityAddictInsanityAddict
    Diet NEET

    I've never seen the attraction of 3-day music festivals. Too expensive to go for only a few acts, you aren't worth a damn for the latter days due to sleeping shitty unless if you have too much blood in your alcohol and it's a tradition to set your tent on fire on the last day.

  • CountryPumpkinCountryPumpkin
    I clench my fists and yell "anime" towards an uncaring, absent God, and swear solemnly to press my thumbs into Chocolate America's eyeballs until he is blinded, to directly emasculate sporting figures, to beat the shit out of tumblr users with baseball bats, and to quietly appreciate what Waylon Smithers being gay means to me.

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