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So I was watching Sleeping Beauty yesterday for the first time since I was a kid.
"Hey, I was just passing by and heard you singing, and I thought you might be interested in a duet."
"Clearly we're made for each other!"
I mean, what the hell. And she's lucky she happened to meet her "true love" on the very same day of her 16th birthday because otherwise that ending wouldn't have been nearly as happy.
And don't even get me started on Ariel--Little Miss Sells-her-soul-for-a-guy-she's-never-spoken-to.
Comments
>attempting to encapsulate an entire relationship in a two-hour movie
^^,^ Hmm, what did you think of Beauty and the Beast?
Apparently, ol' Walt realized how hokey that kind of thing was back since Cinderella since the movie makes nods to the plot being silly, but it's been a while since I saw it.
As a kid I had the wonderful ability to differentiate between the way love worked in Disney films, in my book of Celtic Fairy Tales, and how it worked real life. How long was the average courtship in the time these stories first became oral tradition, and how long between that and the first time they were written down? I do tend to have more issues with the movies than their written counterparts (case in point: The Little Mermaid). But you find similarly accelerated zero to hero stories in fiction as well. It doesn't excuse the fall in love instantly, but I can let that initial burst of infatuation, those first few days where this is obviously the person you are going to love forever and ever, cover that.
I love pretty much all Disney movies but the whole relationship thing never made sense to me. I'm ashamed to say that I don't remember the specifics of Beauty and the Beast, though, as I haven't seen it in years.
Belle was working in Beast's castle for whatever reason. Something something about him helping her father or something.
At least Disney seems to be somewhat better about romance in their new movies. In The Princess and the Frog and Tangled the romance, while pretty compressed was more a result of the characters being together and getting to know each other as opposed to "oh god hotness I want to kill a dragon and live with you forever!"
To be fair, it's not like Sleeping Beauty's plot was Walt's idea
I'll admit if this happened I'd at least ask her out on the spot.
In Beauty and the Beast (most versions, not just Disney), Belle was hostage-traded to the Beast in place of her father. I mean at least she's presumably there long enough to get to know the guy, but it's still creepy and Stockholmey.
Well, to be fair, when woodland creatures are trying to shack you up, it might be a good idea to go along with the whole 'destiny' idea.
Dude fuck woodland creatures (note -- don't actually fuck them, that's icky). We're talking about a subset of life where multiple species rack up a higher body count than the entire history of foreign terrorism. Hell, ducks have been having a protracted evolutionary arms race of how to more elaborately rape each other. Excuse me for being leery of their advice.
In Beauty and the Beast, wasn't it clocks and teacups trying to shack you up?
And a horndog french candlestick.
^^^
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Honestly, I don't see anything creepy with Disney version of Beauty and the Beast, because Belle only started to show affection for the Beast after he did something decent, and she refused to put up with his bad behaviour.
Insofar as Disney female leads go, my favourite is by far Mulan.
The only romance in it is some endearing awkwardness at the end. The rest of it is pretty much Mulan being awesome.
I think my problem with a lot of romance in general is that it paints a perfect picture with the commencement of a relationship: it simply being the reward at the end.
I think the reason I prefer what I like to call the 'horror-romance' genre (which is obviously pretty rare) is because it deals with people having to deal with each other. Granted, the situations are extreme but it deals with the very real issue of problems arising with someone you care about.
Baccano! has my favourite fictional romance.
Anyone who's seen it knows exactly which couple I'm talking about.
Nice and Jaccuzi or Isaac and Miria?
Are they really named Nice and Jacuzzi?
I generally tend to see romance in fiction as a poor substitute to friendship, but oh well, I can settle for it.
^^^^The people who decide to steal from the mafia?
Nice and Jaccuzi from what I saw didn't get a lot of exploration as a couple.
Bestest couple in anything, ever.
Nice and Jaccuzi are really sweet and endearing, but even they're no match for the above.
Isaac and Miria are stuck in that weird phase of a relationship where the couple is ridiculously close to the point of functioning more like a single entity than two people but it isn't forced.
Again, my problem with a lot of romance is that it can't portray a longstanding couple of having serious drama.
^^ That stage is pretty annoying to observe from a distance.
On the other hand, Isaac and Miria are just too well-meaning, foolish and naive for it to be stupid and annoying.
^ That's certainly a concern, although serious drama in a relationship isn't unavoidable. A more realistic baseline would be pretty good, but that doesn't mean hitting the other extreme and depicting dysfunction.
Well, I always liked that in Scott Pilgrim, Scott and Ramona weren't obsessively clingy over each other. In fact, they spend a lot of time in constant relationship drama.
You know, when it's not all Dust Loops and lead pipe swordsmanship.
^^Oh, I think a longstanding relationship can certainly have plenty of drama in it. It's just that most fiction doesn't seem to want to portray it.
I am stealing this phrase.
You are not getting it back.
*nobleman bow*
We need more movies where the relationship is already in place by early on at the latest. Let it be a critical part of the characters, not an idiotic and shallow "reward" for being a hero.
I also always liked how HG101/ SMPS described Cecil and Rosa's relationship from Final Fantasy IV as unprofitable nowadays due to lack of ultra lame tsundere antics. (obviously, they're being sarcastic, but they're obviously expressing a lot of weeaboo hatred here.)