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Idiots on Kongregate

SaigyoujiSaigyouji
edited 2012-01-08 15:25:08 in Wonderful posts
But you never had any to begin with.
Put this in wonderful posts because honestly, it doesn't fit anywhere else.

Anyway, as some of you know, I'm a moderator over at Kongregate, and I've run into some... "interesting" individuals because of it. All of the following comes from one person, in a short time span.

"however i am against gays"
(Not him): "why are you against them?"
"no idea im not scared of them im just hate them as much as hitler hated jews"

Genocidal homophobes. That's new. ...Ok, I'm lying. That's not new at all.

"i hate blacks."
(Warn him to stop with the racism/homophobia/etc.)

"you just made me cry for real"
"you made me cry hard...very hard and im hyperventilate from it"
HOWEVER WILL I REPENT FOR THIS SIN?!
"this isnt gonna end well either after sadness comes raging hell"
Oh no. ...I've awoken the gazebo! And here is where it gets... weird.
 "however darx wont go away clean....you will know soon enough your luck will be running out the cider was the 1st one"
...Er, yeah.
(Ask him to explain)
"it was explaining things, i just said it cleverly to where its hard to process"
No... You really didn't. Well, you did make it hard to process, so, bully to you?

"it had nothing to do with people"
I AM NO LONGER A PERSON. ;_;
 "basically i said that your luck will run down and things that you have overtime will become no more."
No, you really didn't.
"you said you had no cider "
"it happened from luck, and you wanted more"
...And here I was thinking it ran out because I drank it.

"basically what i said at first was a keep one eye open for trouble."
Is this some kind of prophecy?

...So, yeah.

Comments

  • WhaleWhale
    Champion of the Whales
    Omg, there is a site on the internet worse than TVT?
  • SchitzoSchitzo
    They're somethin' else.
    Que la chingada
  • nohaynicklibrenohaynicklibre
    edited 2012-01-08 15:29:40
    Kichigai birthday!!
    ^^ Yeah, I heard there's a site full of banned tropers just bitching about shit,and then there's another site bitching about them,and you even have to pay to go in!

    ^The correct term is que chingada
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    edited 2012-01-08 15:47:47
    No rainbow star
    Holy crap, it's like insane troll logic come to life
  • MillerCrossMillerCross
    You can change. You can.
    I can't believe I'm doing this, but...

    --pats Saigyouji--

    man, that job sucks.
  • FirebertFirebert
    I'm a little disturbed by this.
  • Naas_HumanNaas_Human
    This makes me wish somebody could get Commander Obvious to join the site.
  • snowbullsnowbull
    Cue-bey
    Kongregate had a forum? Why?
  • CountryPumpkinCountryPumpkin
    I clench my fists and yell "anime" towards an uncaring, absent God, and swear solemnly to press my thumbs into Chocolate America's eyeballs until he is blinded, to directly emasculate sporting figures, to beat the shit out of tumblr users with baseball bats, and to quietly appreciate what Waylon Smithers being gay means to me.
    To discuss te deep sociological implications of "You Have To Burn the Rope", I guess.
  • BeeBee
    edited 2012-01-08 16:55:58
    Mostly to trade strategies or organize clans for some of the multiplayer games.  I mean how else are you going to figure out which kind of building the programmer had a hardon for in all those poorly balanced tower defense games?

    But seriously, some of the chat rooms and forums there are hellholes.  My condolences, man.
  • SaigyoujiSaigyouji
    But you never had any to begin with.

    Ah, the joys of guys who try to get mod positions by asking.


    "Can I have a application for moderator?"


    (Hint: The answer to such questions is always no. Or nooooooooooooooooooooo.)


    "Do you want the short answer or the long answer?"


    (See above.)


    "I want the 'here's a job' answer?"


    (That's a terrible answer!)


    "Jobs are paid. This ain't no job."


    "You are required to do stuff, it's a job."


    (Those damn uppity cotton pickers, complainin' about their jobs!)


    "So, schoolkids have jobs?"


    "technically yes."


    (Wish I got paid for going to school. :<)


    "just give me a job dude "


    "don't have time for your shenanigans"


    (KNEEL BEFORE ME, ALICE, GODDESS OF SHENANIGANS!)


    "What gave you the idea I was ever going to listen to your demands?"


    "Because you know I'm the type that will be a persistent pester if you don't hand over an application and vouch about my skills."


    (Because I've never dealt with anyone like that before.)


    "I am quaking from fear."


    "Well if you want to stop looking over your shoulder you will give me what I want and pronto!"


    "I could have your job if I wanted to."


    "I know people."


    (Damn, did I annoy the mafia again? I need to stop doing that.)


    "Oh no. What will I do. I had better acquiesce right now! ...Or not!"


    "Start with an apology would be good."


    "I think you got things a little backwards."


    (I wonder who was having more fun here?)


    "I know people... do not test me."


    "Knowing people is a normal human trait, odd as that may seem."


    "But I know 'People', powerful people who would slice you from the ranks for my honor."


    (Awww damn, I annoyed the Samurai Mafia, not no ordinary mafia. :<)


    "Honour isn't exactly much of a resource round here."


    (Who'da thunk it?)


    "I am actually an admin and I could slice ya anytime."


    (That doesn't sound very honourable at all!)


    "Why would an admin need a mod position? That would be one hell of a downgrade."


    (It's true! I'd love to be paid!)


    "ApprenticeChief is moments away from giving me your password"


    (For the record, AC is another mod and a good friend.)


    "I wanted to see if u were giving out moderator applications like ur supposed to"


    (But we aren't! Well, not to any Tom, Dick, and Harry.)


    "u failed my test. do u think u deserve a second chance"


    (Poor U. Always being picked on. Why not E, or O?)


    "You failed a grammar test. Does that count?"


    "Don't judge you're superior young pupil!" 


    (Guess I failed the force or something. Am I a padawan?)


    "Three years of modding and I'm still a pupil? Maybe I should invest in time machine technology."


    (I wanna time machine. :<)


    "Maybe you need a whoopin'."


    (...Southern samurai mafia.)


    "How scary."


    "Did you forget who I am already or are you asking me to bring out my sledge hammer."


    (Oh damn, is this gonna turn out like Borderlands? That fight sucked.)


    "I've just been assuming you're someone who doesn't know their place."


    "My place is above you mentally, physically, and occupationally. I can see you don't respect the job I gave you here and would like a sincere apology pmed to me."


    (Quite impressive for someone who's never seen me. Maybe he has cameras in my house? Ninjas, perhaps? I'm scared! :<)


    "Shall we end this little charade? You're about as convincing as every other person who comes to me grovelling for my support."


    (Ok, that's a lie. He's a little more fun.)


    "You can apologize."


    "Ok ok. I'm sorry you're so boring."


    "No, make it sincere." 


    (I did! ...Kinda!)


    "My mistake. I'm sincerely sorry you're so boring."


    (Again, kinda. He's more interesting than most of the chaff.)


    "No, sorry that you disrespected your superior, me."


    "You appear to be suffering from delusions of grandeur. I think you can get medication for that."


    (At this point, he ran off and got silenced for spamming by some other mod. ...Also, what would you call that medication anyway?)

  • CrimsonCrimson
    Give us fire! Give us ruin! Give us our glory!
    This is great. Go on.
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    No rainbow star
    ^^ What if, one day, you end up rejecting somebody who actually IS connected to the Mafia?
  • SaigyoujiSaigyouji
    edited 2012-02-08 15:21:36
    But you never had any to begin with.

    Then I'll continue living in a country which doesn't have much Mafia presence! Although Italy is just across the ocean.

  • All NinesAll Nines
    Has friends besides tanks now

    Holy shit. I would have banned him at "I want the 'here's a job' answer?"

  • SaigyoujiSaigyouji
    edited 2012-02-08 15:37:28
    But you never had any to begin with.

    Not allowed to ban for stuff that happens in whispers. There's no proof it ever happened. Why I decided to have some fun.

  • IcalasariIcalasari
    No rainbow star
    ...Wait, nothing can happen over stuff that happens in whispers?

    So you could, say, link the guy to 2g1c, claiming it was the application form, and not get in trouble?
  • SaigyoujiSaigyouji
    But you never had any to begin with.

    It's the whole "Admins can't see whispers on privacy grounds" thing.

  • NyktosNyktos
    a little muffled

    So basically I can endlessly harass someone through whispers on Kongregate and not get in any trouble over it?


    That seems...wrong.

  • ninjaclownninjaclown

    Damn fine work, Saigyouji. Keep us updated, need something to laugh at after a hard day. :)

  • All NinesAll Nines
    Has friends besides tanks now

    "Not allowed to ban for stuff that happens in whispers. There's no proof it ever happened. Why I decided to have some fun."


    Ah, right; it would make sense that that's a PM.

  • MillerCrossMillerCross
    You can change. You can.

    Don't you guys keep logs of these things? And what about an screencap?

  • All NinesAll Nines
    Has friends besides tanks now

    See, this reminds me of why I like moderating IJBM (not that it needs much moderation anymore); even if people are annoying, most of the time you can at least tell that there's a respectable intellect forming those words.

  • ClockworkUniverseClockworkUniverse
    OOOooooOoOoOOoo, I'm a ghoOooOooOOOost!

    ^^Screencaps can be manufactured.

  • MillerCrossMillerCross
    You can change. You can.

    Figured as much.

  • ClockworkUniverseClockworkUniverse
    OOOooooOoOoOOoo, I'm a ghoOooOooOOOost!

    It's another reason why I like IJBM's PM system.

  • IronweaverIronweaver
    if u do convins fashist akwaint hiz faec w pavment neway jus 2 b sur

    Ah, Kongregate. Since every game comes with a chatroom, there is one "game" which consists only of an empty black screen, as it was meant to be used only for chat. I decided to check it out, out of curiosity, and got in the middle of several 14 year olds' cybersex session. I had great fun trolling them and being generally idiotic, gross and surprisngly insightful, considering the "types with his face" style of leetspeak I used. I still feel sorry that there was no way to save the log.

  • NovaNova
    If you must eat a phoenix, boil it, do not roast it. This only encourages their mischievous habits.

    (Wish I got paid for going to school. :<)



    I do! :D



    most of the time you can at least tell that there's a respectable intellect forming those words.



    yeah about that >_>

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