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Menstrual Cycle

TnopheliaTnophelia
edited 2011-02-22 10:00:58 in General
YOU WILL NEVER FUCKING KNOW HOW THIS WORKS. EVER. THE BOOKS ARE LYING. THE INTERNET IS LYING.

ITS FUCKING HORRIBLE, LIKE A STARBUCKS DARK CHOCOLATE MOCHA BEING MADE WITH MY UTERUS. EXCEPT IT RUINS MY UNDERWEAR AND FORCES ME TO TEND TO MY BODY WHEN I DONT WANT TO.

I would rather be playing Hisoutensoku than BLEEDING FUCKING EVERYWHERE

This humors me so. I can't wait for the day the male body mutates to the point where BLOOD SPEWS OUT OF YOUR DICK EVERY MONTH and you get HORRIBLE SPINE SHATTERING CRAMPS IN YOUR NUTSACK AND ASSHOLE WHILE YOU PUKE ALL OVER YOUR BLEEDING DICK WHILE YOU SHIT AND CRY!!!!

Comments

  • MyrmidonMyrmidon
    You should direct Gorn movies.
  • TnopheliaTnophelia
    Your mother is a gorn movie
  • TnopheliaTnophelia
    Ah, Sorry aobut that Myrmie. I am just fucking it hurts right onw
  • Central AvenueCentral Avenue
    Trust me, I already know that I won't feel anything like menstruation or pregnancy. And I feel kinda bad about that.

    Me Too.
  • DonZabuDonZabu
    I'm torn between feeling bad and laughing my ass off.
  • Trash_VortexTrash_Vortex
    More proof for the nonexistance of God
  • randomtropeloserrandomtropeloser
    ^^^ Me to... again.  Is it wrong that I'm intrigued by the idea of male pregnancy?

    -takes notes-  To a sick individual like me, that actually doesn't sound like a bad afternoon.  Tno, would it make you feel better if I gave myself a hernia and then drank a bunch of coffee and hot sauce?  I was already planning on doing two of those three things anyway, and the experience that follows might help me relate to your pain. 
  • glennmagusharveyglennmagusharvey
    Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human
    I blame nature for this, frankly.  Nature should have designed a better reproductive system for humans.
  • randomtropeloserrandomtropeloser
    Yeah, like one where the male can choose to carry the child instead of the female.  (I'm still secretly hoping that science will one day make this possible.)
  • glennmagusharveyglennmagusharvey
    edited 2011-02-22 12:32:14
    Creature - Florida Dragon Turtle Human
    I've always found it rather annoying that the female reproductive system works basically as carpet-bombing batch processing.  Batch processing in that it's not a continuously-functioning system that's ready for use anytime; carpet-bombing as in "let's just keep making batch after batch all the time in the hopes that customers stop by", while throwing out the batches that go unused.

    Now the male reproductive system is also batch processing, but it is carpet-bombing; it is on-demand.

    This problem first came to light when I invited some friends over for a pool party, and one of my friends said that, for gender-specific reasons, she couldn't go swimming on that day.  (It wasn't a pool party anyway; of the four people who came, only one came with swimwear and water guns.)  So that instance caused me to think, why does this constraint exist at all?

    (That's "gender" meaning "biological sex" in this case, before you give me heck about it.)

    Note that I've also pondered such ideas as an on/off switch for one's sex drive.

    Note also that I find many such "constraints" annoying, from a conceptual perspective.  Vegetarianism, veganism, religious dietary restrictions, other non-medical dietary restrictions, behavior restrictions (such as not being allowed to use electricity on Friday nights, or having obligatory prayer/worship time during certain times of day or week), and more.
  • randomtropeloserrandomtropeloser
    I know, it's like nature had to go and tell us "Okay, depending on what gender you are, you have to do these exact things at certain times.  And no choosing whether you get to be biologically male or female, I get to choose that for you!  Good luck!"  Thankfully, we've got science to help us tell nature to go shove it.
  • GelzoGelzo
    Pony Sleuth
  • snowbullsnowbull
    edited 2011-02-22 19:28:26
    Cue-bey
    All in all, I think being male is worth it, if only for the biology.
  • BobBob
    I SHARE YOUR PAIN, TNO

    ALL CAPS DOESN'T MAKE IT BETTER, NO MATTER HOW FUN THEY ARE
  • randomtropeloserrandomtropeloser
    Semi on topic, I just found the best article ever!  (It's this, btw: http://www.science20.com/challenging_nature/a_real_pregnant_man_almost_certainly_possible_but_it_might_kill_him )  Hooray!  Now all I need is a woman who will be willing to let me have her babies.
  • IcalasariIcalasari
    edited 2011-02-23 07:08:06
    No rainbow star
    Well, I recently (recently being a few weeks ago. But even centuries would be recent with the hell that was) had a kidney stone, and the pain was so bad I literally puked from it, and my penis hurt like hell when the stone wasn't even near it

    ...So is that close enough?
  • MiyaMiya
    edited 2011-02-23 07:20:08

    Mine is... manageable.

    Interestingly, I'm playing Hisoutensoku at the moment.

  • randomtropeloserrandomtropeloser
    If it's any consolation, this topic has inspired me to ensure that my next several trips to the bathroom will not be pleasant ones.
  • TnopheliaTnophelia
    >:/
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